Lesbian Tools for Identifying a STRAIGHTBIAN

In recent posts Mrs Dirt and I have written individually and written together, slowly chipping away at centuries of Lesbian inaccuracies, revealing a dual picture of the oblique perception of Lesbian and the Women who have forged that skewed perception by co-opting Lesbian. By injecting biology back into the paint, each post is a brush stroke laying bare the vast differences in Lesbian behaviour vs the behaviour of Girls/Women. These differences are KEY to understanding ourselves, our unique behaviour and our place (or lack thereof) in Hetero society and perhaps more importantly possessing the tools to recognize the overwhelming number of (STRAIGHTBIAN) Women hetsplaining their distorted approximations of Lesbian that has gone to make many STRAIGHTBIANS wealthy, fortified many more academic careers and generated an impotent political movement (Radical Feminism), carving a treacherous landscape that threatens the safety of every Lesbian alive least we mention every Lesbian dead!

The more tools we have in our Lesbian arsenal, the better equipped we are to fight the egregious lies STRAIGHTBIANS/RadFems have lead society and worse Lesbians ourselves into believing. Below are some core behaviours that should raise a Lesbian red flag or two:
  • Regardless of age, declaring they're a Lesbian is constant, excessive and over the top. Lesbian youth obviously are allowed a honeymoon period when they first come out, but once acquainted with other Lesbians/Lesbian community that shout-it-from-the-rooftop-I'm-a-Dyke fades. If said Lesbian is 40 something and still acting like they just came out-BEWARE!
  • If heavily involved in abortion rights/rape issues/prostitution/domestic violence and other Heterosexually focused topics/groups/activism-BEWARE!
  • If arguing with men/MRAs/men calling themselves women/transwomen etc factors heavily in their life/day to day-BEWARE!
  • If sexually abused between the ages of 0 to 18, particularly 0-12 straight females have either an aversion to males or a pathological need to be sexual with men. For sexually abused straight females who developed an aversion to males, the hypersexual pathology still persists. This may present itself as a seemingly intense sexual newness that can be mistaken for normal Lesbian relationship newness/passion, but instead of a genuine Lesbian passion, the hypersexuality is due to pathology rather than legitimate Lesbian passion. Lesbian passion surely involves sex, but the intimacy developed through sex and passion quickly matures into a Lesbian relationship. Hypersexuality as exhibited by STRAIGHTBIANS/sexually abused straight females never develops beyond the sex stage, and parallels the internal age they were frozen at when the abuse occurred. That isnt to say that a STRAIGHTBIAN and a Lesbian may not form a long term involvement, but that involvement never develops into a fully mature intimate relationship. Lesbians usually find themselves confused in these involvements, often playing out the role (over and over) of a rescuer/saviour/helpmate and if the involvement lasts beyond a year the once hypersexual (straight) partner's interest in sex wanes (Lesbian Bed Death). BEWARE!
  • Repeated claims of victimhood, usually where none exists. Repeated attempts at creating seemingly useless/needless drama. BEWARE!
  • Pathologically (paranoia) thinks everyone is either an enemy and/or makes enemies out of everyone at some point. BEWARE!
  • Can seem younger than their age (child-like/teeny bopperish)-again stuck in time (like the needle on a scratched record)-usually at the age they were sexually abused. BEWARE!
  • Adamant in the belief that any woman can be a Lesbian. REALLY BEWARE!!!!!!!!!!!! 
  • Exhibits stalkerish behaviour toward love interests, exes, perceived enemies. BEWARE!
  • Will perseverate on real or imagined slights (Borderline Personality issues) and stop at nothing to get even (time or money no object). BEWARE!
  • While as Lesbian youths we all play around with our look (hair/clothes etc), but where you see this persisting past the age of 30 (excessive piercings/tattoos/shave heads/mohawks/pink/blue/funky hair colours/gothy/clothing usually worn by preteens/teens etc). BEWARE!
  • These Women are often either directly or indirectly involved in versions or variations of the kabbalah, shamanism, witchery, tarot reading, runes, crystals, moon howling, drum circles, art projects involving their period blood, crones, midwifery, before marriage between same sex was legal they were often involved in ceremonial blessings/unions, high priestery, celestial shitola and many other special snowflakeries. STRAIGHTBIANS will have deeply studied or tried any or all in vain efforts to fix their early traumas/themselves. BEWARE!
While Lesbians also suffer from sexual abuse, due to differences in brain function, Lesbians obviously behave differently than Girls/Women who were abused. And because sexual abuse is usually perpetrated by a male, natural attraction isnt problematic for Lesbians in the way it is complicated for sexually abused Women. While we will elaborate these differences and complications in a later post, our point here being is that the behaviours listed above are not displayed in any enormity by sexually abused Lesbians or any Lesbian for that matter, they are however seen in high levels in STRAIGHTBIANS.

So to recap, we are not saying your new girlfriend's interest in the kabbalah or astrology should send you running for the hills, we are saying if you can tic multiple checks beside our list above-BEWARE!

Until Lesbian biology takes its rightful place, both Mrs Dirt and I individually and together will continue to give Lesbians the tools needed to see themselves as NORMAL, to see imposters in our dating pools and Lesbian authorities and to gain confidence and accuracy in our Gaydar.


Transgender Regret-Happily NEVER After

A reader contacted me a few days ago regarding sharing her transition experiences with a greater audience, because up to now her feelings and her experiences around her transition where negative have not been at all welcome in her ( the Transgender) community. Unfortunately the Transgender community invests only in an All or Nothing narrative, the All being a sanguine version of Transition drugs, surgeries and familial/social experiences where reality isnt even allowed in the backseat.

This is a personal account of one person's transgender/transition experience, it may not be the lacquered version making headlines, but it is no less valid, in fact it is more:

I was born and raised as a female, and recall the first crush I had on a girl when I was 11 years old, she was my best friend in school. I suppressed these feelings, because at the time it was still illegal in the UK to discuss homosexuality in a positive way or to "promote" it. I didn't know anyone who was openly gay and happy, and so I responded with the heterosexual conditioning I had been raised with by society, and considered it wrong. Although I now largely prefer men, I recall strongly the confusion in my 11 year old self over liking a girl.

When I started puberty as a female, I began to feel discomfort in my body. I didn't like the breasts were developing, I didn't like periods, I didn't like how boys would make sexually suggestive comments and I didn't like the pressure from other girls, to be a girly girl. I wanted to remain a tomboy, which ultimately I did.

When I was 17, I joined an LGBT youth website. I very quickly discovered the trans section and began reading people's experiences. I read about people who never felt like girls, who wanted to be men. It felt like at the time, I had found the answer to what I was struggling with. I was a man trapped in a woman's body and that if I changed it, I would be happy and find peace with myself. At the age of 19, I saw a psychiatrist who specialised in gender identity disorders, who diagnosed me as a female to male transsexual. Throughout the entire process I didn't see a counselor or a therapist, to them it was box ticking. I started testosterone in 2011 and am still taking it today.

It wasn't until about two years ago, that I found a group on Facebook which was open to butches, femmes and trans men. For the first time in my life, I was around butch women who were proud of their butchness, who were proud to be butch women. Who took pride in their female bodies and in their lesbian identities. That was when I felt the first pangs of regret about the path I had gone down.

I have had the phalloplasty procedure to surgically construct a penis. The image I had in my head of what it would be, and how it is is completely different. The penis does not look like a "normal" penis and doesn't function like one. I have lost the use of my vagina for sex, because of a procedure they did to construct the urethra through the penis. I now have recurring urinary leakage problems due to the surgery. Risks that I was not made aware of.

I thought transition would bring me peace, it hasn't. I feel a bigger disconnect with my body now, than I ever did before I walked down that path. I am not suicidal and I am getting on well in life. But it feels strange to be seen as a man, because inside I still know I'm not. Since meeting those butch women, I feel an affinity to the term butch, even though I don't currently date women.

Perhaps if I had met those proud women when I was 17, I would have embraced my butch identity sooner and not felt the need to transition. I won't ever know.

At 17, I was not mature enough to make that decision and I personally feel that I was too young to start such a life and body altering process.

Not all trans stories are the happy endings that the trans community so carefully tries to present. There are some of us, like myself, who live in that silent regret, afraid to speak out publicly of their bad decision.


Lesbian Adults are NOT Women-How Hetero-Sociology Ignores Lesbians (part 3 of 3)

The first two posts of this series dealt specifically with how the heterosexual category Girl inadequately describes and fails Lesbian children and Lesbian teens; fails to represent Lesbian children/teenager's thinking processes/emotional processes and behaviours and how those processes drastically differ from heterosexual Girls. This post will delve into how the heterosexual category Woman and Lesbian differ and how the category Woman has for centuries and continues today to harm Lesbians.

As uncomfortable a fit Girl is to Lesbian children and Lesbian teens, it doesnt hold the sheer horror of Woman when applied to Lesbians. Girl, even teen Girl, while clearly heterosexual, the sexual in heterosexual between the ages of say 0 to mid/late teens usually is non existent. Meaning dykes, with minimal effort, can usually ignore being qualified Girl, since sexual feelings (toward another) at young ages is often absent. When the category Woman is applied to Lesbians later on, Dykes can no longer ignore their discomfort or their revulsion, because they are not merely ignoring differences in thought processes, emotions, behaviours, strengths and weaknesses, they now have to ignore the SEX in Woman which translates ONLY to heteroSEXUAL!

Because Lesbian youths do not often have the freedom nor the number of potential partners Girls have growing up, Lesbian adults usually use their 20's as relationship experience. It isnt that Lesbians are less mature than Girls/Women, we simply do not get to practice our relationships at school/school functions, dating etc. It is usually only when Lesbians reach young adulthood and we have control over our destinies that we can (more or less) freely begin meeting others like ourselves. It is unclear whether our lack of dating in youth, our Lesbian biology or our lack of being around large numbers of Lesbians (or all three) affects why Lesbian adults partner differently than heterosexual couples. Its rare to find a Lesbian couple that did the "dating thing" that is so common among heterosexuals. While we meet/find each other in a variety of ways, dating in the straight sense rarely factors in and when it does there is usually a STRAIGHTBIAN in the mix.

Another HUGE difference between Lesbian adults and Women is the BIOLOGICAL urge to procreate and the BIOLOGICAL changes that occur from giving birth. While there is clearly some sociological pressure for (hetero) females to procreate, the gist comes from heterosexual female brain functions. Obviously something evolutionary in order to propagate the species. Whatever it is that triggers that base need/desire among straight female brains, clearly does not exist in Lesbian brains. In the same token, that biological urge to bear children in most straight Women, doesnt come with a guarantee for maternal instincts. There was a minute in the 90's when Lesbians seemed to be popping out babies like puppies, but looking back with a discerning eye, what we actually find were STRAIGHTBIAN couples claiming to be Lesbians or a STRAIGHTBIAN coupled with a Dyke giving birth, not Lesbians themselves. There are clearly more Lesbian pet parents than there are Lesbian people parents, thats not to say that we dislike children, it is to say birthing/raising children isnt a BIOLOGICAL need/desire of Lesbians. And in fact when we do choose to parent either by our loins or adoption, we usually make BETTER parents than heterosexuals.

Some basic core changes that begin in puberty and stay consistent in Women:
  • The biological obsessive compulsion for Males. What are males doing? What are males thinking? What do males think about me? Does he like me? Does he like her? Can I change him? Will he marry me? Why wont he like me? Does he like my body? Even in Women that claim to be "man haters" or "radfems" it is rare to find a time they are not engaged in some sort of interaction with and/or rumination about males
  • Planning their wedding-enough said!
  • Being a mother-see above. 
  • Competing with/undermining/judging and actively criticizing other Girls/Women.
  • Social climbing seems to begin early for heterosexual females. Whether they desire the best trailer in the park or the costliest palace, money/possessions factor heavily in ALL straight female relationships.  
  • Appearance is like real estate to teen Girls/Women-Appearance Appearance Appearance!
  • A seemingly pathological dissatisfaction with everything! And an equally pathological need to bitch, gripe, moan and complain about it. Male brains have an interesting compatible ability to mostly tune this behaviour from heterosexual females out. Dykes who have partnered with Women, can tune it out to a lesser degree than males. All in all, Teen Girls and Women are never truly happy. 
Some basic core changes that begin in puberty and stay consistent in Lesbians:
  • Lesbians whether partnered or single do not lose who we are in effort to center the universe around our love life or any single part of our life for that matter. As wonderful as being in love feels, Lesbians do not change our personalities to fit someone else's, nor do we scheme to change our love interest's personality/behaviour.
  • Lesbians also do not lose focus on our interests/passions/talents over another Lesbian. In fact in most Lesbian adult relationships, Lesbians heavily support our lover's/wife's interests/passions/talents etc. 
  • Lesbian adults are not driven by childhood fairy tales to create the perfect wedding day! Lesbians are more invested in the relationship than the day it is legally official! 
  • Lesbians in the majority are not social climbers, we do not base our relationships on what job our lover has, the money she makes or doesnt make, where she buys her clothes or who her parents are. Its no coincidence than Lesbians are often listed by heterosexuals as being blue collar. Regardless of whether we are or arent working class, we function on purpose rather than perception. Frankly, we dont give a fuck. 
  • Lesbians also fail to be as impressed or impressed at all with wealth/possessions. An area we vastly differ from both heterosexual Women and Men.
  • Lesbians, regardless of the situation tend to be much more even-keeled temperamentally/emotionally than Girls/Women. Historically it is straight female's (seeming) over emotionalism (think hysteria) that caught the attention of early psychiatrists/psychologists since its inception. And lets be honest, from the point of view of a straight male brain whose emotions with the exception of anger/sex are drastically dulled by testosterone, the straight female brained human must seem like a raving hyena! The only thing that caught the attention of  psychiatrists/psychologists (past/present and future) by Lesbians is our romantic interests. Although presently, all psych tests are heterosexually biased and if a Lesbian child/Teen is tested and her test is measured under Girl, she will score as abnormal. If scored as male, she scores in the normal range. 
  • The discomfort Lesbian youths often feel being labeled in the category Girl persists into Lesbian adulthood with the heterosexual adult female category Woman. Some of us learn to exist past/beyond the Woman category once mature and some are never able to and instead try to ease their discomfort by transitioning. Regardless of where the Lesbian is with being improperly categorized as Woman, we are NEVER at home with the heterosexual term Woman
Like the heterosexual category Girl, Woman also presents a barrage of issues for Lesbians. Woman fails to adequately differentiate between Lesbian adult thought processes, emotions and behaviours from heterosexual Woman, it also fails to distinguish our night and day sexual orientation from Women. Lesbian adults are NOT Women and there is no need for Lesbians to pretend any longer that we are Women. The Femmiest of Lesbians cringe when being called a Woman, Woman is an UNFIT category for Lesbians, rather than the heterosexual assumption that Dykes make UNFIT Women! Lesbians are not Heterosexual, therefore Lesbians are NOT Women period, case closed, stick a fork in her ass, she's done...Lesbians have left the building!


Lesbian Teenagers are NOT Teenage Girls-How Hetero-Sociology Ignores Lesbians (part 2 of 3)

In my last post (read here) I discussed how dominant heterosexual culture ignorantly/willfully and wrongfully posits the heterosexual female child category Girl on ALL female children thereby harming and in some cases denting Lesbian children. The damage done to Lesbian children via heterosexual presumptions follows Lesbian youths straight into their Lesbian teens where confusion is compounded and the blooms of self hatred can flourish.

Puberty under even the best circumstances is no picnic, for Lesbian teens it often falls somewhere on the line of difficult, cruel or a nightmare with difficult being the best case scenario. The myriad of issues that Lesbian teens struggle with during puberty can all be traced back to dominant heterosexual culture and the heterosexual categories Teenage Girl or Girl Teenagers/Young Woman. As discussed in the previous post on brain functioning/behaviour differences between Girls and Lesbian children, these differences grow larger during puberty; partly out of how puberty differently affects Lesbian teens and partly from how puberty further develops Lesbian teen romantic feelings.

Some of the core ways puberty differently affects Lesbian teenagers:
  • Lesbian children are not culturally groomed to have our bodies change (develop) for the purpose of pleasing other (teen/adult) Lesbians as/when we mature. 
What does this mean exactly? It means, unless Girls who (most-not all-but most) cannot wait for their breast and hips to develop, and even for their Periods to begin (signifying) adult STRAIGHT female rites of passage, including cultural systems supporting those rites/rights, Lesbian teens have nothing. Lesbian teens arent told by our parents/families/culture that some day some other Lesbian will love our breasts, our hips and our periods are special because they signify our bodies' changing ability for us to one day give birth. (I'm reminded of a Tshirt I wore in the early 90's which stated I fuck to cum, NOT to conceive)

Lesbian teenagers instead (including Lesbian teens who pass as straight) feel uncomfortable, terrified and for some of us even horrified with our changing bodies. Partly because those changes socially signify a new stage in heterosexuality (heterosexual coupling) and partly because those changes signify Woman which links to heterosexuality ie the kind of female Lesbians are NOT. Lesbian teens are not remotely interested in heterosexual coupling anymore than we are interested in performing the heterosexually defined role of (young) Woman.

In the past Lesbian teenagers were especially vulnerable to suicide. Remember unlike emotionally damaged Girls who tend to act out masochistically, Lesbian teenagers act out in (milder anti social) ways often associated with male teen behaviour such as taking drugs, drinking, getting into fights (with male peers), punching or kicking walls etc. And where especially hurt/sensitive, Lesbian teens were prone to suicide and suicide by more violent means more similar to male teens than to teen Girls.

In lieu of the current pro Transgender moment, Lesbian teens are now vulnerable to suicide via transition. Meaning Lesbian teenagers are seeking to kill themselves through transition, a living death if you will. And while that may seem more productive than death itself, it by no means equals happiness and unfortunately (statistically) signifies only a delay in actual suicide.

Another core area Lesbian teenagers differ is romantically:
  • The (hetero) teenage landscape which has (for centuries) spawned a bazillion books, plays and TV shows/films where teens get to practice adulthood and specifically adult romantic couplings is barred to Lesbian teens. 
For all the Liberal Lefts reminders hetsplaining of how far homosexuals have come (because of them mind you), as a Lesbian and as far as Lesbianism is concerned, I'm here to tell you that for every gain, there is a multitude of losses, and for every loss a multitude of advancements that never came.

Lesbian teens do not possess the luxury of practicing Lesbian adulthood or Lesbian romances with another Lesbian teen. And where there is the rare occasion that two Lesbians find each other in grade school or junior high, it is rarer that they can freely (safely) explore their feelings at say a school dance or walking hand in hand through the schools hallways or invited home to meet mom and dad. There are much more occasions where Lesbian teens have tried, only to be bashed, kicked out of school or home or all of the above. There is no adequate junior high or high school support of Lesbian teens, because Lesbianism itself is still (even among Radical Feminist/Feminism) suspect, disbelieved, co-opted or hetsplained into the unrecognizable!

Lesbian teens are often used/abused by Girl peers, treated by Girls all too often as boy stand ins who are immediately dumped/pushed aside when a Boy teen shows a Girl interest. Unlike Girl peers who are biologically/socially understanding of Girls dumping/blowing other Girls off for Boys, Lesbians are routinely emotionally hurt and understandably confused. In the same vein, all messages Lesbian teens receive are heterosexually transmitted. Lesbian teens either have the gumption to reject these foreign messages (which happens only rarely to the Lesbian loner) or more likely try and apply heterosexuality to their Lesbian experiences which again, usually means playing Boy to some Girl which always ends in Lesbian heartbreak or worse.

Lesbian childhood may be confusing, but Lesbian teen years can be down right painful, even suicidally lonely. For all of technology's globally shrinking the world via internet connections, Lesbian teenagers remain distant from each other and even more distant from honest, useful and accurate Lesbian information. Lesbian teenagers are pelted with hetsplained notions of Lesbian children/teen and adult behaviours/experiences as abnormal or gender non conforming as Liberal homophobes loathsomely put it today.

As lonely as Lesbian teen years can be, it is far better to be lonely than to be the trial run for some straight Girl/s culturally sanctioned hetero sexual dalliances. Since the innate Lesbian ability to find one another has diminished in the last hundred years making Lesbian teen romance fraught with even more difficulty, some Tips for Lesbian teens in avoiding the pitfalls of Lesbian/Girl teen crushes/romances and for potentially finding each other:
  • Cliches are cliches for a reason, that said by all means join a school sport! Lesbians have many natural athletic abilities superior to straight Girls, therefore chances increase in finding a Lesbian teen friend or girlfriend if you join a sport or school sport.  
  • Girls at puberty suddenly lose their straight minds for Boys (boy crazy). This (crazy) lasts throughout the child bearing years of Girls/Women and mildly subsides only after menopause. If your crush suddenly cannot stop talking about/thinking about/doodling about some boy, chances are she is NOT a Lesbian, regardless of any practice kissing she might have done on you and no matter how important she made you think you were to her. Once her adult heterosexual hormones kick in, Lesbian teens become toast while Boys become everything. Let her go!
  • If you are being treated like a Boy stand in by a Girl in any capacity, the fact she views you as a Boy says she does NOT see YOU as a Lesbian. This is a huge issue even adult Lesbians can be confused by, that begins in Lesbian youth. Do not be flattered when you are being treated like a Boy/Guy, be angry you are not being seen as a Lesbian, teen or otherwise! 
  • Lesbian teens, like Lesbian children rarely play head games or boy/girl games. Lesbian teens tend to be more serious, not always serious about school but serious/reflective in their every day approach. 
  • And outside of sports, Lesbian teens are rarely school function joiners. Look for the tough or cool teen, that teen who dresses for comfort over style, that teen always quick with a joke, that teen who wears crudeness with pride, that teen who is on all sides yet no ones side. Say hi to her, you just might find a Lesbian comrade or Lesbian friend or more.

Missing Person Kristin Snyder: Lost in a Sea of Myths Pt 2

The next part in our forensic postmortem of the mockumentary The Lost Women of NXIVM will consist of dissecting the major proponents surrou...