Change Your World-NOT your Body

Monday, January 21, 2013

Transition and Dysphoria

I've been noticing in comments both here and at Twitter, a great deal of confusion surrounding transition and dysphoria.

First and foremost TRANSITION DOES NOT CURE DYSPHORIA!!! Wash, rinse, repeat!!!

The majority of those who transition (straight white males-autogynephiles) have never suffered from dysphoria. Dysphoria doesnt inform their god desire to recreate "woman" in their image, masturbation does.

Males who transition who do suffer from some form of dysphoria are gay males. Males (mostly minority)  whose internalized homophobia leads them to hate their bodies.

Females who transition (mostly lesbian) develop intense dysphoria usually around puberty. There is an extreme feeling as the body develops breast/curves and begins menstruation of the body betraying how the female had grown up thus far, seeing herself.

But ALL women on some level, due to pervading misogyny/sexism, experience some level of dysphoria around their/our bodies.

As mentioned above, dysphoria is not cured by transition. There is a temporary lifting of the extreme dysphoria which led to seeking out transition, but once the early trans high wears off, dysphoria returns. Often times, dysphoria returns with a vengeance!

Because transition seeks to change the healthy body and ignores the unhealthy mind, dysphoria (mental) remains. Using transition to cure dysphoria is akin to force feeding anorexics to cure anorexia.

dirt

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68 comments:

  1. excellent distinctions. I appreciate your clarifying this confusing area.

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  2. Hey dumbass, quit trying to explain something you know absolutely nothing about. Next time try actually ASKING a trans person about it.

    But I guess you are just too stupid to realize just how stupid you look when you write such crap. *SMH*

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  3. You're utterly wrong. You know nothing about trans people's lives or experiences. There is no 'trans high', and most people who transition do not regret it at all, and go on to lead happy and productive lives in society. Transition doesn't cure all ills, nor will any reputable person tell you that it does, it merely cures the mismatch between the individual's sex and gender, and in the most urgent cases makes it possible for them to avoid suicide.

    You keep spouting all this nonsense over and over again, when the real, lived experiences of actual trans people continually prove you wrong, and it just makes you look stupid to those who know the truth.

    Ordinary trans people, trans men and trans women, are out there, They're in your streets, your schools, your workshops, your factories, your hospitals, and yes, in your toilets. You don't see them, because in most cases they look just like every other person around you.

    They are getting on with their lives. Why don't you show some decency for once, and leave them in peace?

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  4. @ anon 4:30am
    Very well said, totally agree. But she aint gonna stop, just like the Westboro Baptist/Fred Phelps bunch facts & reality be damned she's gonna keep on spreading mis-informantion along with her hate-filled opinions until she's no longer relevant in cyberspace.

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  5. @ 7:09 AM

    Yes. She doesn't care about the harm she does, either. It's disgusting. Trans people have enough to deal with without her hateful screeds on top.

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  6. Truth is ETERNALLY relevant and will ALWAYS prevail!

    dirt

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    Replies
    1. Yes, which is why so many people are refuting this garbage. Thanks for pointing that out!

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  7. Anon@ 11:38 Look before you leap.

    dirt

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  8. Dirt, you wouldn't recognise the truth if it bit you in the face.

    You keep comments that show trans people in a bad light, all the while deleting those which correct misinformation. And then you whine about censorship of GenderTrender ( a vile anti-trans blog full of hate speech). That makes you a hypocrite and a coward

    If you weren't, you'd leave all comments up, for everyone to see and decide for themselves who's right or wrong. But you won't because you aren't interested in the truth, only your anti-trans propaganda.

    How about you show some decency and leave trans people to get on with their lives without your hateful shit?

    What you do isn't feminsm of any kind, it's hate-speech and bullying.

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  9. AnonymousX

    "Hey dumbass, quit trying to explain something you know absolutely nothing about. Next time try actually ASKING a trans person about it.

    But I guess you are just too stupid to realize just how stupid you look when you write such crap. *SMH*"

    When people start off a post or written article with "Hey dumbass", I seriously doubt if there is going to be any intellectual rigor in his or her post.. Why do trans identified people assume that they are the only gender non-conforming people on the planet? The transgender community does not have a patent on any and all gender non-conforming behavior both past and present. Throughout history, various people have always stepped outside the boundaries of traditional sex roles of what is and isn't considered proper masculinity and femininity. These intrepid people weren't always called transgender, and they weren't always surgically or chemically castrated. When it's stripped down to its bare essentials, prior to transitioning, about the only thing different between butch lesbians and transmen is a label or identity. In terms of behaviors such as a preference for boy's clothes, sports, rough and tumble play, cars, machinery, and that special butch swagger, they are similar. I can name several transmen who were not as gender non-conforming in their behaviors as I was a child. Unlike Chaz Bono, whose parents dressed up in pretty little dresses when she went onstage, my parents could never get me into a dress. Isn't it true that Thomas Beattie was once a teenage beauty queen with long black hair and colourful blouses and skirts. My parents would have to had tied me down or drugged me to ever get me to participate in a beauty pageant. I would have run away at the very thought of this horrid thing happening. Of course, some people will say that Chaz Bono and Thomas Beattie always knew they were boys ,and you never thought you were a boy. Well, this isn't exactly true. It's so strange to me that Chaz Bono never said she was a man trapped in a woman's body during all the years she identified as a lesbian. In the book about her coming out as a lesbian, I don't believe she says anything in this book about feelings as if she is a man trapped in a womans' body. Perhaps the only difference between gender non-conforming girls and women and trans identified girls and women is that the former weren't exposed to transgender politics and things like "T". I have a confession to make. I was always a tomboy when I was younger, and for awhile I actually thought it would be cool to be a boy. I envied their freedom, and they didn't have to wear dresses or worry about their hair all the time. I had a heck of a lot more fun around the boys as I tagged along behind them with my baseball mitt tucked under my arm. I think the two major reasons why I am gender non-conforming butch lesbians as opposed to trans is because I was born before "top surgery" became so widely used, and I was exposed to feminism while in college.

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  10. AnonymousX

    "Hey dumbass, quit trying to explain something you know absolutely nothing about. Next time try actually ASKING a trans person about it."

    When I look at the face of these six-teen and seven-teen year old girls with their base ball hats, short hair, and their struggle to be accepted for not being frilly girls, I see myself at that age. I have felt exactly like they feel. I felt the intense displeasure from my parents who wanted me to be more feminine, and I often felt like an outcast no matter where I was. I buried my feelings into my school work and sports.

    These sweet and intelligent girls don't have to bind their breasts which can mis-align ribs, take "T" which is an external source of testosterone, undergo "Top Surgery" which essentially amounts to elective mastectomies on healthy breasts with surgical resizing resizing of areolas and nipples, . They can step outside the boundaries of traditional sex roles that society imposes on them and still be proud of being female. They can do boy things and still be a girl, and it's not necessary to radically change their exquisitely beautiful and complex female body to do this.

    Again, prior to transitioning, about the only difference between a self identified butch lesbian and transman is one of definition. The trans community doesn't want people to know this, and for some strange reason, they think that all gender non-conforming behavior both past and present can only be understood or interpreted through a transgender lense.

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  11. AnonymousX

    "First and foremost TRANSITION DOES NOT CURE DYSPHORIA!!! Wash, rinse, repeat!!! "

    Dirt, I can say from personal experience that this statement has an element of truth to it. "Transitioning" wasn't necessary at all in my ability to finally recognize and to conquer my body dysphoria that I felt surrounding my breasts. It was a slow process that took years, but I've been blessed with the ability to love and cherish my female body.

    I want to return to this issue of gender dysphoria, and relate it to how girls and women really feel about their bodies, and how culture, the devaluing of girls and women, and childhood sexual abuse might play a role in body dysphoria that is so common in females. I was a tomboy when I was growing up. Indeed, my fondest memories as a child are of me running through the woods in back of our house, building forts, and playing baseball with my brother. I don't know why, but while most girls were playing with dolls, there was nothing I enjoyed more than the smell of the grass and the muffled ping sound of a ball as it struck the bat at the sweet spot for a solid double. I knew how to slide into third at age twelve.

    When I started puberty, I felt intensely awkward as if what was happening to my body meant that I could no longer hang out with the boys. I had to put away my baseball mitt that I loved and become a girl. Boys always seemed to have more fun and far more freedom to do as they please. Being a boy represented a form of Independence that I could never sense in a girl. Besides regretting puberty and all the changes in my body, thinking back and analyzing my life experiences, there was another reason why I felt especially uncomfortable with my breasts. I can say with all certainty that my body dysphoria or revulsion I had towards developing breasts was partly related to my grandfather touching me inappropriately on my developing breasts. I can't recall the exact age, but I was about twelve or thirteen and I had just started developing breasts. One warm summer day my dad was going to drive my grandfather home since grand dad didn't have a car. I was wearing a light tan colored shirt and I wasn't wearing a bra at that time. It's funny how I can recall what I was wearing that day. I was sitting in the back seat of the car with my grandfather. My dad stopped at the post office downtown and got out of the car. I was alone in the backseat with my grandfather. I recall him reaching over to me and touching my breasts. It was no accident at all. He was trying to caress my breasts. I didn't know what to say, and I got out of the backseat of the car and started to walk home. I don't know why, but I didn't tell anyone. I was deeply ashamed more than anything else.

    It might make me sound old, but I was born before people started using the words "top surgery". I grew up in the country, and no one even heard of the word "trans". At any rate, if someone told me that they could remove my breasts, I would have done it right then and there. Because I felt so insecure, and always hid my breasts, I would have had it done at age sixteen. I associated anyone even looking at my breasts with that sick, terrifying feeling I felt in the pit of my stomach when my grandfather's hand felt my breasts. After this incident, I recall clinching my fists and hitting my chest until it bruised. I didn't want to be a woman, and I didn't like my body. My body and breasts were betraying me, and were a source of fear and shame. When I was around sixteen years of age, I started wearing loose fitted sweat shirts to hide my breasts. My hair was short, and on more than one occasional I was mistaken for a boy. I would wear a baggy shirt, put on a heavy coat, put my hands in the front pockets of my jeans like boys and men do, and slouch over

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  12. AnonymousX continued...

    It took me about ten to twelve years before I finally began to cherish and appreciate my female body. It was a slow process that required a great deal of soul searching, and it didn't happen over night. With a loving and patient partner, I actually enjoy my breasts touched now. It's very sensual and erotic. I'm so fortunate that I was born before "top surgery" because I sure as heck would have had them lopped off. I know it might sound strange, but I was in my mid-twenties before I finally realized that my breasts were actually things of beauty.

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  13. I had my top surgery when I was 23 and am now 41. I don't regret it one bit. I don't regret taking testosterone since I was 21 either. I am happily married and have been for 11 years now.
    Until you walk in our shoes, you will NEVER know what we think or go through. Your opinions of trans men are just that, opinions. Nothing more and nothing less.
    What is this "trans high" you claim that we have? I have never experienced no high being trans.

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  14. AnonymousX

    Dirt, I completely agree with this statement.

    "But ALL women on some level, due to pervading misogyny/sexism, experience some level of dysphoria around their/our bodies."

    Yes, and plastic surgery, fashion, cosmetics, botox, etc. etc. etc. make a handsome profit for all those involved in these commerical enterprises. Of course, it's in their financial interests to keep girls and women feeling dysphoric and unsatisfied with their bodies. It's about first creating a market, then filling the market with what you provide. The age old idea of creating a market first, then providing the services that only you can provide is clearly seen in the way that some endocrinologists have jumped on the transgender band wagon. As we all know, their level of expertise is the endocrine system or hormones. Compared to other medical specialties with a bit more prestige, endocrinologists probably don't make as much money as heart surgeons, neurologists, or orthopedic surgeons. If the endocrinologists start "trans kids" out on puberty suppressing drugs, then cross gender hormones, they literally have these patients for life.

    Plastic surgeons have no financial interest in making women and girls feel secure about their bodies so that they think they will have no other option than to pay for something that supposedly makes them desirable and whole. In this blog, I brought up the fact that approximately 90% of plastic surgery patients are women, but most of the surgeons are still male.

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  15. @Damon,

    There are regrets, and as more teenagers talk about "T" and "top surgery" there might be more regrets.

    "Dr Richard Curtis, who was born Vanda Zadorozny, but had a sex change in 2005, is being investigated by the General Medical Council, after at least three separate complaints.

    The London-based GP is accused of prescribing sex change hormones “to several patients” that were not appropriate and also ignoring restrictions placed on his practice.

    In one case reportedly under investigation by the GMC, the doctors’ regulator, a woman complained she regretted undergoing treatment, which included having a double mastectomy and taking hormones.

    In another case, it was alleged Dr Curtis prescribed sex change drugs to patients under 18, without the specialist knowledge or skills to do so.


    It is alleged that Dr Curtis, who provides private treatment to patients pursuing “gender reassignment”, failed to follow accepted standards of care."

    http://www.telegraph.co.uk/health/healthnews/9784545/Dr-Richard-Curtis-transsexual-doctor-faces-investigation.html

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  16. Damen,

    You sound like a more mature transman, but I seriously doubt if all these 16, 17, and 18 year old girls have any idea of what they are doing. They hear something about "T" and think it's all they need. They simply call it "T" now. Damen, was there "Trans Kids Purple Rainbow" when you were young? Do you think six and seven year old kids really are transgender? Damen, have you ever heard of puberty suppressing drugs for "gender dysphoria"? This is when they give drugs to children to deliberately delay their puberty. Damen, what do you think of breast binders for teenager girls? Long term binder use can mis-align ribs and cause other problems. After all, these are developing bodies. Also, Damen, what do you think of "online gender therapy" in case a person can't fine a therapist to sign the letter for sex reassignment surgery?

    I don't mean to sound disrespectul because at least Dirt or another person wasnt being called "dumb ass". I've always said that there might be a few rare individuals who might benefit from transitioning, and you might fall in this catefory. However, I seriously question 80% to 90% of what I've observed within the last decade or so. In many cases, I see "transitioning" as something of a trend in that it's being promoted. "Top surgery" is being advertised along with other plastic surgery procedures.

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  17. Damon, you said that you have been married for 11 years. Am I right to assume that this is legal marriage? I congratulate you. I was with my last ex for about 15 years, but I was not allowed to marry. In many states and several countries, same sex couples cannot marry.

    I read somewhere that one of the reasons that Thomas Beattie transitioned and legally changed her sex was so that she could legally marry the woman she was with. At any rate, they are divorced now.

    I've known gay and lesbian couples who have been together for twenty years, but were never allowed to marry.

    Doesn't "transitioning" to a man have its perks? Many times better pay, and better tax benefits because you can file jointly, etc. etc.

    At any rate, I'm happy with your marriage.

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  18. @ Anonymous X

    T and top surgery don't get handed out like sweets. That's why there are gatekeepers, real life tests, puberty blockers, etc, to make certain that the individual is definitely trans. Most people who are not trans will work it out soon enough, and become gender-nonconforming women, or non-binary people (yes, non-binary people exist and some of them take T or have top surgery, some don't).

    These sweet and intelligent girls don't have to bind their breasts which can mis-align ribs, take "T" which is an external source of testosterone, undergo "Top Surgery" which essentially amounts to elective mastectomies on healthy breasts with surgical resizing resizing of areolas and nipples, . They can step outside the boundaries of traditional sex roles that society imposes on them and still be proud of being female. They can do boy things and still be a girl, and it's not necessary to radically change their exquisitely beautiful and complex female body to do this.

    You keep missing the point. These sweet innocent girls are not there in the first place, if they are trans male. And there are plenty of cases where adult 'women' transition, after a lifetime of trying to be the butch lesbians you keep wanting them to be, and failing, or simply feeling completely alienated from the female body they don't want. The oldest person I know of is 56, and talks about his relief at finally shedding the fake female persona he's had to wear like a strait-jacket all his life. Another is 40, another in their thirties, a happy and successful health worker. There are others. Try reading Matt Kailey's blog, if you want to read reasonable people talking about trans people or all types. Not Dirt's biased nonsense.

    If you decided you aren't trans, that's fine for you. You have the right to choose what yo do with your own body and life. I'm glad you are a happy butch. But yo cannot and must not force your choice on other people, particularly those you know only from Dirt's cherry-picked sample of young trans men. Maybe some of them will decide they aren't trans once they start looking into transition. Not every trans person takes hormones, or has surgery. Some take T for a time then stop because they have the changes they want. Some have top surgery and never take T. Many don't have lower surgery (it's costly, and not always as satisfactory in function as MTF genital reassignment).

    There is no single way to be trans, just as there is no single way to be a women. Some trans man are extremely femme, don't like 'male' pursuits, games or anything of that sort. Some realise gradually that the discomfort they've felt all their lives about not feeling female is because they're not really female, they are male. It's not about liking sports, or misogyny, or delusion. It's about feeling your body is incorrect, every moment of every day, that the body parts you have are not the right ones.

    Are there young trans men who think everything will be sunshine and roses once they've transitioned? Of course. Because people are human, and not everyone is perfect. Transition only cures one problem, not all problems a person may have. Trans people still face many hurdles, even when they pass - and many of those problems are caused by people like Dirt, who create an atmosphere of prejudice and hate and misinformation around them.

    Do some people de-transition? Yes, of course. Because people are human, and sometimes get it wrong. But some do so because society refuses to allow them to live peacefully as they wish.

    Don't be one of those people. Leave them in peace

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  19. I actually heard of three cases personally where young trans men had underwent an hysterectomy (amputation of the uterus) on their bodies just to have sex with men without the fear of possible pregnancy. In due to this ill-thought action they suffer side effects in the same range like elderly women in their menopause!!

    Go browse certain dating sites and you will notice that there seem to be tons of trans males who were into "same" sex action, fucking with or rather letting themselves get fucked by genetic men, that is.

    So, why are they so afraid to be with genetic men, having PIV action with them AS females? Some of them who "magically" turn "fag-hag-gay" after starting transition used to identify as lesbian, too. How come?

    It seems to me that it is pure guilt in alignment with their body dysphoria what leads the so called "gay/bi//pan/queer trans men" into their high fashioned new label, trying hard to turn their female bodies into a subject which will not be enslaved by the male gaze or abusive male sexual behavour. You could feel sad for them.

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  20. @ 6:14 AM

    In due to this ill-thought action they suffer side effects in the same range like elderly women in their menopause!!

    Twaddle! If they are taking T, menopause, as you mean it, will not occur. And you do not 'amputate' a uterus. T replaces the absent female hormone just as well as the HRT a menopausal woman may take. And usually trans men have their uterus removed for precautionary health reasons (since most don't want to bear children, being male).


    It seems to me that it is pure guilt in alignment with their body dysphoria what leads the so called "gay/bi//pan/queer trans men" into their high fashioned new label, trying hard to turn their female bodies into a subject which will not be enslaved by the male gaze or abusive male sexual behavour. You could feel sad for them

    And you could stop misrepresenting them and their experiences. What business is it of yours how they or anyone else chooses to have sex, using whatever equipment they have? Do you go around poking your nose into non-trans people's pants as well?

    Sexual orientation can also be fluid. Not everyone is 100% straight or 100% gay/lesbian. And who said they are afraid to be with 'genetic' men? Only you. People's sex lives are their own business. What's in their pants is their business, How they use it or not use it is their business.

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  21. First HRT increases cancer in females.

    Second, misogyny is EVERY woman's "business"!

    dirt

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  22. Lesbians who transition, in the majority, will after their brains are soaked with "T" heterosexualize.

    dirt

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  23. To the woman calling herself "damon", if you didnt regret it all you wouldnt be here trying to convince us otherwise. You would be happily living your life and have never heard of this blog.

    dirt

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  24. @ Dirt

    Misogyny is not the issue when talking about what is in a trans person's - or any persons - pants. YOU drag it into everything to do with trans people.

    If the only reason anyone transitions was to gain male privilege, there would be no trans women, who lose all male privilege when they transition from male to female. Get your head out of your arse, woman, and actually recognise reality.

    Trans people exist. They have the right to exist without people like you disrespecting them, calling them liars, fakers, perverts, rapists, deluded, and all the other hate that's spewed here.

    You talk a lot about erasure, yet you're quite happy to erase and ignore the lived experiences and testimony of trans people. How about you stop that, eh? If you have issues with individual trans people's behaviour, take it up with that person, and that person only. Don't tar everyone with the same brush.

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  25. @ Dirt

    If you were happy living your life as a butch woman, you would be on the internet spewing daily hate and misinformation about trans people. Once again, you try to erase the testimony of a trans person, in favour of your blind dogma.

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  26. @ Dirt

    Ack! Typo! Meant to say:
    If you were happy living your life as a butch woman, you wouldn't be on the internet spewing daily hate and misinformation about trans people. Once again, you try to erase the testimony of a trans person, in favour of your blind dogma.

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  27. @ Dirt

    Lesbians who transition, in the majority, will after their brains are soaked with "T" heterosexualize.

    Got news for you, they weren't really lesbians to start with. Also, bisexuals. They exist too. And strangely enough, none of them need your permission.

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  28. Twaddle! If they are taking T, menopause, as you mean it, will not occur. And you do not 'amputate' a uterus. T replaces the absent female hormone just as well as the HRT a menopausal woman may take.

    Oh Please. Of course menopause will occur, sometimes even very badly just as it gets when women overhastily get their uteruses amputated due to lack of competence by some (not surprising: mostly male) medicals.
    Do you actually think, testosterone will help keeping a former healthy vagina intact? Bad news: It will not.
    I heard many trans men reporting atrophy of vaginal and urethral tissue, getting more prone to bleeding and infections. It is not uncommon for some to experience cramps even years after the last menses, too. I guess, for trans men it is not the heart which will feel heavy of guilt but rather their estrogen starved uteruses.

    And usually trans men have their uterus removed for precautionary health reasons (since most don't want to bear children, being male).

    The best health precaution would be not taking "T".
    Even if trans men would be real men, I still don't see how they could ruin a functioning body like they do. Maybe in the US it's not relevant what some bewildered girls and twisted fruits do to themselves, but in other countrys the working class actually have to pick up the tab for these misogynist treatments. So the bottom line is, women in europe who work hard and still underpayed have to come up for female body mutilation, transition makes a great deal for patriarchy.

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  29. "...due to pervading misogyny/sexism..."

    your argument does not cover sheltered children/young-adults who experienced the same internal anguish as non-sheltered children/young adults. interested to know how you would explain a female child raised with little to no "stereotyping", in an equal gendered home, homeschooled, unsocialized, did not watch TV, use the internet or have any general concept of gay vs. "transgendered" culture? considered herself the "little brother" of captain hook when she was 7? "king of the mountain" playing on top of a pile of snow when she was 5? preferred boy's clothing & bathing suits? dipping into an unexplainable depression after puberty hit because her clothes did not fit her correctly anymore? subliminal brainwashing by, what, air particles? the microwave, maybe? the cat? lol.

    just curious, because most of what i've read of your posts seems to blame society for "pressuring" these people into transitioning to avoid uncomfortable "sexist" situations, but small children (prepubescent) praying to god that they wake up the next day as the opposite sex due to personal internal discomfort? do you have an explanation for that?

    thanks

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  30. Thank you for this post, "Dirt!" I always knew this to be true at a subconscious level, but now that you spell it out like this, I realize why I just couldn't identify with the "trans" community once I saw them baring their scarred-up chests and waving their rubber penises around! I have NEVER felt "dysphoric" about the "lack" of a penis, because I see my body as the PRESENCE of something different! And the dysphoria about my breasts can be easily explained by the fact that I was an early bloomer put in kindergarten at age 6 instead of 5 (I could've graduated with 2001 had I skipped a grade like many counslors recommended, but decided to stay with 2002). This caused many kids to think I'd "failed a grade" despite my 100's and 99's allover my report card, so naturally, I hated what caused me unwanted attention from male teachers and older boys (several grades above me). I also felt "masculine" for being excellent in math, taking high school math courses in jr. high, but have now realized that it may have been cauesd, in part, by me being with younger kids despite a high intelligence. But now, as I approach 30, I realize that much of my emotional "maleness" could just be from my SIGN (Gemini), rather than my "gender identity," and wouldn't get phalloplasty if I had BILLIONS of dollars!!!

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  31. What is strange is all the 'trans' people who come to this blog voluntarily and then tell Dirt to leave them alone as though she is coming at them and telling them what to do. I'm sure there are heaps of anti-gay (or anti-Jewish or anti-American etc. etc.) blogs and sites out there; it's never occurred to me to go to them and tell them how they're oppressing me.

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  32. @ Iris

    The problem with you, Iris, is you think that just because you feel the way you do, that everyone else who identifies as trans is the same, and therefore some sort of fraud or fake. But your experiences are yours only, and just because you explain away your feelings of malesness that way, doesn't mean everyone else is going to. You're not trans. We get it. Fine and dandy for you.

    Other people are trans, and would appreciate not being told they're freaks, thanks very much. So what if a few excited kids are showing off their new chests? What's it to you?. You're not trans, so it's not aimed at you. Go on about your business and leave them alone.

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  33. Well, Dirt lies about our lives. She also has suggested that we are child molesters or rapists, and that our partners are child molesters. Transexuals are generally hated and mistrusted by the entire world. We have historically been treated like scum. I know that, and I'd never bother visiting general hate sites. What intrigues me is the idea that women or lesbians own the bodies of transsexual men to the extent that you can judge, condemn, dissect, analyze, lambast, ridicule us, and make faulty conjecture about the quality of our lives. It's fascinating from a sociological point of view. Many of you seem to be operating from such an incredible scarcity mentality, as though our lives and happiness can possibly take away your happiness. Which kinda makes me think you might not have any happiness. While my female, lesbian, and feminist friends who are wildly intelligent don't view my transition as a threat or failure. They seem to grasp that we are different people, and that awareness is a fundamental necessity in terms of psychological development for humans. The straight people I know may not understand my life, but they don't view it as their problem. Which makes me wonder if lesbians are marginalized to such an extent that some of you cannot grow or mature enough to understand your lives are yours, and ours are ours. I used to wonder the same thing when I heard dykes call women gay who clearly loved men. Is it that misery desperately needs company? I find this all fascinating and somewhat entertaining. Regardless, it does very little for women here except confirm that they were internally miserable and suffering humans long before transmen came into public view.

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  34. @ 9:37 AM

    Even if trans men would be real men, I still don't see how they could ruin a functioning body like they do. Maybe in the US it's not relevant what some bewildered girls and twisted fruits do to themselves, but in other countrys the working class actually have to pick up the tab for these misogynist treatments. So the bottom line is, women in europe who work hard and still underpayed have to come up for female body mutilation, transition makes a great deal for patriarchy.

    It would help if you tried to make actual sense. And using insults like 'bewildered girls', and 'twisted fruits' (a homophobic slur) doesn't exactly help your cause, either.

    Trans men don't ruin their bodies by transitioning. That's just your prejudice. And what the hell is all the crap about the working class picking up 'the tab'? What tab? Do you think there are no working class trans people? That they don't pay taxes? Your rant is poorly worded, and ill-informed.

    ReplyDelete
  35. The "twisted fruits" are the MtF's, which are so much more disturbing (and plentiful) than the FtM's that I cannot even come up with enough words to express my disgust for them. And, btw, I HAVE "gone on about my business" by not watching anymore FtM videos on YouTube. But it still bothers me because even from a biological male, I DESPISE the sight of shirtlessness and cannot, for the life of me, understand why these people, who use to be in my shoes, would want to flaunt that long-standing MALE-PRIVILEDGE on the Internet!!! Nothing makes me less welcome than the sight of a brute sitting on the couch in just his boxers, drinking a beer between smokes (both of which I've NEVER DONE, in addition to having sex of any kind). I find it very PRIMITIVE (caveman-ish), to say the least, and the STP device is even more abominable because it looks like the ugliest, most dangerous (and hated by me) part of the human body!!! Even the wicked world of TV would blur it out to protect innocent eyes.

    ReplyDelete
  36. That settles it. Iris is an FTM troll posting fake shit here to make you ladies look worse than you already do. Nothing else could explain her particular brand of wackiness.

    ReplyDelete
  37. Dirt, Your a hateful piece of shit. I am not going to hide behind an anonymous name because you dont scare me.

    ReplyDelete
  38. Anon, how in the WORLD can I be an "FtM troll" if I haven't put the first molecule of testosterone in my female body, nor bought so much as a binder, let alone surgery?!?!?!? And "Sophia Banks," GET OUT OF OUR WOMEN-ONLY SPACES, you weirdo MAN!!!

    ReplyDelete
  39. Not the sharpest tool in the shed, are you Iris?

    ReplyDelete
  40. @ Dirt

    Deleting comments again, Dirt? So not cool. How about you delete Iris's transphobic and homophobic slurs while you're at it? Funny how she's allowed to get away with calling mtf trans people 'twisted fruits' and freaks, isn't it?

    I told her to grow up. You need to do that as well.

    ReplyDelete
  41. AnonymousX

    Attention: Trans Thought Police...

    As usual, the trans trolls come along and any rational discussion quickly comes to a halt. It always starts out with intelligent posts, then the trans thought police come along and call Dirt, Iris, or someone else "dumb ass", "hateful piece of shit", or far worse, or tell Dirt to die in a fire etc. etc. etc. If we are so awful, why do they keep coming here? The reason they keep coming here is because they don't want anyone to think outside the box. Any thought crime that isn't in alignment with standard trans talking points has to be shut down. This is what they are afraid of, and this is why they have to come here and call us "dumb ass" or whatever. I've been called a fucking cuntasourus rex . I do admit that "cuntasourus rex" was a unique slur, so I give them points on that one. I suppose it's a combination of a cunt and an extinct dinosaur. It's hard to tell, but the malicious nature of the comment is crystal clear. I've stopped counting the number of times Dirt has been called a cunt. They have to suppress critical thinking because the truth is too much for them to handle.

    Also, I wish people would stop harassing Iris. She might not be the most eloquent person in the world in the way she phrases her thoughts, but she has a right to speak. She is honest and direct sometimes to a fault, but she speaks from the heart. I've noticed a pattern. The trans thought police come in here and intentionally pick out someone to harass. It's kind of like a skilled predator going after a weak or injured animal. After calling them ding bat, dumb ass, stupid, or whatever ad nauseum etc. etc. etc., they take great delight in watching them get upset.

    As for me, I'm used to how the trans thought police treat anyone who disagrees with them. I'm sure Suzanne Moore is well aware of their preferred method of operating. Isn't it true that several people that I'm assuming are somehow associated with the trans community tweeted Ms. Moore that:

    "...trans-misogynist asshole extraordinaire"

    "For the record Suzanne Moore is another human being who should jump off the empire state building with a fishing line for a bungee rope"

    "Suzanne Moore is a cunted cunt"

    "I will cut your face off and feed it to wolves."

    http://gendertrender.wordpress.com/2013/01/18/tweeting-suzanne-moore-a-random-sample/

    Suzanne Moore was hounded and ridiculed in the most vile, disgusting, and utterly misogynistic manner imaginable for typing one sentence that wasn't in accordance with standard trans dogma.

    If we are so evil, why do you keep coming back here other than to suppress what people think? Guess what, not everyone thinks the way you do, and ideas are very powerful things. Do you think we are going to remain silent forever? The answer is no because not even the threats that drip with the most vile, base misogyny can silence all of us.



    ReplyDelete
  42. Rest assured that I couldn't care less what some "trans" person (whether FtM or MtF) thinks of me, because most likely, it's the fake hormones doing the talking.

    ReplyDelete
  43. AnonymousX

    "Trans men don't ruin their bodies by transitioning."

    This is my suggestion: Replace the special, magical sounding word "transitioning" with what it entails and see how it sounds.

    Who exactly are transmen? Isn't transman just another word for a biological female who identifies as trans? After all, they are still genetic females who are born as females from the womb of a woman. Whether they admit it or not, isn't this the reality? Biological females don't ruin their bodies by:

    (1.) Double incision mastectomy on both healthy breasts with the surgical cutting off and trimming down of areolas and nipples that then have to sewn back on. Loss of sensation is a possibility because the nipples are cut off and trimmed down for the sole purpose of appearing more male like in appearance. Drains are left in for about a week to drain off excess fluid.

    (2.) Taking an external source of a synthetically produced hormone which is often simply referred to as "T" by 16 and 17 year old girls. Although testosterone usually isn't prescribed until after the age of 18, isn't it true that in some cases, 16 year old girls are given testosterone? Are we to believe that the human female body is designed for long term testosterone use? If the ovaries and uterus are still intact, PCOS is a possibility with long term use of testosterone. This is why some physicians recommend a hysterectomy within five years of starting testosterone.

    (3.) "Bottom surgery" is very expensive because it often requires multiple surgeries and skin grafts that have to be taken from the thigh, arm, or another part of the body. Of course, skin grafts from the thigh, arm, or wherever aren't erectile tissue like an actual penis on a biological male. Erection is only possible with a pump, and pumps have been known to fail. Some loss of sensation is a possibility among other issues that might arise. If the female urethra is extended, this has it's own challenges.

    With any surgery, a hospital acquired infection is a remote possibility along with complications from anaesthesia, etc.

    Double Incision Mastectomy With Nipple Grafting

    ReplyDelete
  44. AnonymousX continued...

    Trans men don't ruin their bodies by transitioning."

    When biological females "transition", it often radically alters their breasts, genitals, and reproductive systems. Along with the drastic alteration of female anatomy, actual female identity is erased. I see FTM "transitioning" as a feminist issue in that the mutilation of female bodies has a thousand year old history. I tend to view women's history in particular in terms of countless centuries not decades. I don't know if it is possible to clearly distinguish between debilitating "gender dysphoria" and internalized misogyny, peer pressure, or other cultural influences that might effect one's decision to "transition". On this very blog, some members of the trans community have already admitted that culture and peer pressure might play a role in one's decision to transition. When I watch and listen to youtube videos of 15, 16, and 17 year old girls already talking about "T" and "top surgery", I often wonder where this is all coming from.

    I know I've said it many times before, but I'll keep repeating it. If we are wrong about FTM (female to male) "transitioning", it looks like female genital mutilation to me. I don't know if I would call it actual female genital mutilation, but I sense that it's a form of violence being carried out on the female sex. When I see actual areolas and nipples being cut off the female anatomy to be reshaped, I sense something almost ancient that haunts me. This might be a frightening statement to some, but people usually have a propensity to disregard unplesant things.

    ReplyDelete
  45. @ 6:45 PM

    It's funny how it's okay for people here to insult and attack trans people, but the minute any of them fights back, you cry foul. There are plenty of instances where trans people have been called vile names on your precious Gentrender, and worse, yet that's deemed to be just fine, because hey, they're just m2t's, right, not human at all? Their struggles and pain don't matter.

    Suzanne Moore was called out politely for inappropriate things she was implying about trans people. She then proceeded to sling transphobic insults at trans people on Twitter. Some people who her words hurt, who have heard words like that too many times from people who should know better, hit back. Maybe some of them went too far, but then, so-called feminists have been saying shitty, disgusting things about trans people for years. Where were you then?

    As for Iris, maybe if she stopped using homophobic and transphobic slurs, and denying trans people the right to exist, she'd get fewer angry comments. Where were you when she said bad things about trans women and men? Nowhere.

    If trans people come here and comment, it's in hopes of stopping the spread of more lies and misinformation and abuse against them. Why do you find that a surprise? Why are trans people the thought police when they defend themselves, as a minority, against others who seek to disparage and deny them? Why not you?

    ReplyDelete
  46. @ 8:53 PM

    Why do you keep repeating all this stuff about surgery, as if trans men don't know it? There are risks attached to any form of surgery. If someone chooses to have the surgery, they must accept the risks. In most cases, those risks are not enormous, and are acceptable to those who require the results gained from the surgery.

    As for testosterone, female bodies also produce some naturally-occuring T, and some females who don't identify as trans have high levels of it.

    Removing the reproductive organs lowers the amount of testosterone needed by trans men to a much smaller amount. Most trans men don't want their female reproductive organs, since they are men, and are not interested in bearing children (a few prefer to keep them., it's perfectly possible to go off T for a while and resume fertility if desired).

    ReplyDelete
  47. @ 8:57 PM

    The only female identity you have a right to dictate is your own. Anyone else's identify is not yours to define or deny.

    Is it possible to think you are trans and be mistaken? Of course, because people are human, and humans make mistakes. But most people who are not trans will find out soon enough, even if they get as far as taking T before they realise. They can stop taking it, reassess things, and decide whether or not to continue. In most cases, after a time, if the person is genuinely trans, or sufficiently trans-masculine, they'll go on to transition fully. if not they might decide they butch, or genderqueer, or something else. Transition is not a runaway train. You can get off anywhere you choose.

    ReplyDelete
  48. AnonymousX

    Sorry, if the link doesn't work, just copy and paste....

    You are supposed to be able to use html tags here, but they don't always work.


    http://www.surgerytheater.com/video/6423/Dr.%20Daniel%20Medalie%20performs%20FtM%20top%20surgery%20(double%20incision%20mastectomy%20with%20nipple%20grafting



    "Top Surgery" (Double incision mastectomy with nipple grafting)

    ReplyDelete
  49. AnonymousX

    Trans Thought Police continued...

    "If trans people come here and comment, it's in hopes of stopping the spread of more lies and misinformation and abuse against them. Why do you find that a surprise? Why are trans people the thought police when they defend themselves, as a minority, against others who seek to disparage and deny them? Why not you?"

    This was the SECOND POST on the topic at hand with Dirt being called a stupid and more stupid "dumbass", so the trans thought police were quick out of the gate on this one...

    "Hey Dumbass...what a good way to start a conversation."

    January 21 at 11:38PM

    "Hey dumbass, quit trying to explain something you know absolutely nothing about. Next time try actually ASKING a trans person about it.

    But I guess you are just too stupid to realize just how stupid you look when you write such crap. *SMH*"

    Please believe me when I say that Dirt has been called far worse than dumbass.

    http://dirtywhiteboi67.blogspot.com/2011/12/so-much-fear-and-hatred-from-this-trans.html

    ".....You are such a weak little old hag of a bitch. Get raped by a bunch of niggers you old crow."

    "You made this story up you fucking ugly OVER-THE-HILL sagging tits, fat ass ugly repulsive CUNT. You're just jealous that you're OLD AS HELL and can NEVER EVER transition successfully the way us young dudes do! We are the men you can never, ever be. Medical science, nanotechnology and genetic engineering is advancing in ways your tiny female, estrogen-dominant gossipy female brain can NEVER imagine. CUNT. And being 25 I will reap the benefits and you will just be a corpse. You're not even masculine, this shit you're doing here is totally female...gossipy manipulative psychological warfare. Why don't you take your fat, over-sized, child-bearing hips sagging cottage cheese ass back in the kitchen and cook your disgusting wrinkled, obese crew-cut trainwreck you call a "girlfriend" another Swanson dinner you useless OLD HAG. KNOW YOUR PLACE and stop treading on us. Stupid useless cunt. No wonder there is so much misogyny...it's because of bitches like you. Suck a fat one and get AIDS".

    SOURCE:

    http://dirtywhiteboi67.blogspot.com/2011/12/so-much-fear-and-hatred-from-this-trans.html

    By the way, the way some members of the trans community treated Suzanne Moore was horrific. They wanted to silence what they didn't want to hear. It certainly appears to have been a form of intimidation against a female they happen to disagree with. Simply because a male wears a skirt doesn't mean that he automatically loses his sense of male entitlement, especially to silence uppity, outspoken women.

    Here is a can of RidFem...

    https://www.facebook.com/photo.php?fbid=3042989746089&set=a.1030604477715.2007291.1003456955&type=1&ref=notif&notif_t=like&theater

    Spray rad feminists the trans activists don't like...similar to roach spray...

    Speaking of defending yourself, Cathy Brennan, a middle aged short female, was cornerd by a trans/gender queer male taller and younger than she is at a Dyke March. She was minding her own business, and a male gets into her face, and proceeds to lecture and scold her. Transwomen and their male cronies cowardly corner females, but would never get into the face of a large male. The vast majority of actual acts of violence against transgender persons are carried out by straight males, or males in general. Women are guilty of saying things that the transgender community doesn't like, so this is why male trans people feel entitled to put the mouthy women in their place. They are cowards because they don't have the balls to confront males who are physically bashing them. Cowards....

    ReplyDelete
  50. I guess the "I'm pre everything" sentence every FtM says in her "intro" video is a bit perplexing to me.

    ReplyDelete
  51. @ 5:08 PM

    It just means the person hasn't taken any steps yet towards physical transition and therefore sometimes still look like girls or women.

    Transitioners sometimes like to compare their appearance 'pre-T' (before taking testosterone) with their appearance later on in their transition process, to get a sense of how far they've progressed.

    To the uninitiated viewer, it can be a startling transformation.

    ReplyDelete
  52. "I guess the "I'm pre everything" sentence every FtM says in her "intro" video is a bit perplexing to me. "

    This essentially means some 16 or 17 year old girl read about "T", breast binders, or "top surgery" online and thinks she must be "trans" because she doesn't like dresses etc. In most cases, especially in teenage girls, they have no real idea what "transitioning" entails. The trans community actually promotes breast binding. There are websites that say they give away used breast binders to women under the age of 21. Breast binding for long periods of time can mis-align ribs and cause other health problems. But, what the heck! Who cares about their developing bodies and skeletons.

    Don't expect the trans community to tell you what "pre-everything" really means.

    ReplyDelete
  53. "Is it possible to think you are trans and be mistaken? Of course, because people are human, and humans make mistakes. But most people who are not trans will find out soon enough, even if they get as far as taking T before they realise."

    QUESTION: WHAT IF YOU GET BOTH YOUR BREASTS LOPPED OFF, AND THEN DISCOVER YOU AREN'T TRANS?

    http://www.guardian.co.uk/society/2013/jan/06/transexualism-gender-reassignment-richard-curtis

    "A woman who alleges that she was inappropriately prescribed sex-changing hormones and then wrongly underwent a double mastectomy is one of several complaints being investigated by the General Medical Council about the doctor who oversaw her aborted gender reassignment, the Guardian has learned."


    "Dr Richard Curtis, who was born Vanda Zadorozny, but had a sex change in 2005, is being investigated by the General Medical Council, after at least three separate complaints.


    The London-based GP is accused of prescribing sex change hormones “to several patients” that were not appropriate and also ignoring restrictions placed on his practice.


    In one case reportedly under investigation by the GMC, the doctors’ regulator, a woman complained she regretted undergoing treatment, which included having a double mastectomy and taking hormones.

    In another case, it was alleged Dr Curtis prescribed sex change drugs to patients under 18, without the specialist knowledge or skills to do so.

    It is alleged that Dr Curtis, who provides private treatment to patients pursuing “gender reassignment”, failed to follow accepted standards of care."

    http://www.telegraph.co.uk/health/healthnews/9784545/Dr-Richard-Curtis-transsexual-doctor-faces-investigation.html

    ReplyDelete
  54. @ 11:34 PM

    I said she was a horrible person, which she is (and her words and actions towards trans women prove it) I did not say she should be killed, or physically harmed in any way whatever, nor did I write anything which suggests otherwise.

    But if someone spends their time devaluing, insulting and disrespecting the lives and existence (even the right to an existence) of an already bullied and harassed group, they shouldn't be surprised when some of the people in that group hit back.

    You think radfems don't use threatening language towards trans woman? Bullshit.

    ReplyDelete
  55. @ 11:44 PM

    'Pre-everything' means what I said it means - that the person speaking has not yet begun hormone treatment, nor had surgery. Sometimes they haven't yet begun to wear boys/men's clothes or cut their hair in a more boyish style, or come out to anyone else as trans.

    This essentially means some 16 or 17 year old girl read about "T", breast binders, or "top surgery" online and thinks she must be "trans" because she doesn't like dresses etc.

    No. No, no, no. It's not about liking 'boy things'. This is the deliberate mistake you people persist in making, over and over again, to make it look like trans people are deluded little girls, so that you can patronise them and devalue them as trans people.

    And suggesting that no one in the trans community warns about the dangers of binding is also a lie. Many trans men do so, regularly. They know the risks. Do you think they don't? You're wrong. There are plenty of posts on the internet about how to bind as safely as possible, and warning against using ace bandages, etc. Why do you imagine trans men take the risk of binding? It's not because it's cool, it's because it helps their dysphoria and helps them to be accepted as male by society.

    Also, some trans men don't bind, some don't want T, some won't have surgery. Everyone is different.

    ReplyDelete
  56. I think they're all sick, twisted FREAKS, whether FtM or MtF, because they have a delusion as to what it really MEANS to be "male" or "female." The FtM's are just girls who grew-up playing with Barbie dolls, and when they couldn't live-up to Barbie's unrealistic proportions, they decided to become "Kens"...in the worst possible way, LMAO!!! Most of the MtF's, on the other hand, are straight men with a fetish about "being a woman," so OF COURSE radfems have harsh words to say about such perverts! They will NEVER be a woman, because they can be as promiscuous as they want without any fear what-so-ever of becoming pregnant, and the FtM's haven't a CLUE about true manhood, which is a state of not caring what others think of your appearance. The mere fact that someone would even REMEMBER the men "farting loudly" in the men's room and make a video about it just proves how much of a GIRL she really is. And the one whose main channel was ThatGabe (really Amanda) in 2009 and posted several videos to multiple "colab channels" made one about how "the girls might make fun of you if you took a smelly dump, boo-hoo-hoo!" (And OF COURSE she deleted MY comments.) But my thoughts were like, that's about the stupidest reason in the WORLD to "become a guy" and just proves how much of a little WEENIE she is for even thinking that! No man would care what some 9-year-old child thinks of his BM's, and despite being 100% female, NEITHER DO I and have NO public restroom "shyness" issues what-so-ever!!!

    ReplyDelete
  57. @ Iris at 1:18 PM

    You're idiotic, Iris, Truly. But you're also bigoted and nasty with it, as well as being very, very wrong. Many ftm people develop very curvy body shapes, and large breasts, and hate it because it makes their dysphoria far worse and passing very difficult and painful. You think that's funny, do you? How disgusting of you. Equally disgusting is your spouting of 'freak' and 'pervert' towards mtf people. And yet you claim moral superiority?

    They will NEVER be a woman, because they can be as promiscuous as they want without any fear what-so-ever of becoming pregnant, and the FtM's haven't a CLUE about true manhood, which is a state of not caring what others think of your appearance.

    WTF? Your horrible prejudice and bigotry is showing again, Iris. And lol, 'true manhood'? Maybe you should cut back on the glue-sniffing. Plenty of ftm people don't give a flying fart about those gender roles you're trying to force on them. Femme ftms, they exist. Butch trans women exist too.

    And a lot of mtf people long to be able to bear their own children to the man they love, and would swap organs with you in a flash. so you can stop with the lies now about how being transfeminine is just to fuck unsuspecting men. Do you seriously think anyone is going to go through years of harassment, hormone treatment, expensive and painful surgery, risk losing their friends and family, just so they can sleep with a few guys without the risk of getting pregnant? Got news for you, if they want to sleep with guys, they don't have to do a single thing to their bodies, they could just stay gay. But they don't, because they're not men. I know of only one case where anything like that has happened. One. Single. Instance. And the person in question was rich enough to bypass all the usual checks and therapy and gatekeeping which usually steer away those who need something other than medical transition.

    No man would care what some 9-year-old child thinks of his BM's, and despite being 100% female, NEITHER DO I and have NO public restroom "shyness" issues what-so-ever!!!

    Maybe you could try making sense next time. And of course, in your world all men are coarse brutes while all women are sweet simpering feminine airheads, right? Sheesh...

    ReplyDelete
  58. No, I'm not a "sweet simpering feminine airhead," but that doesn't make me a "man!" A man is merely someone put on earth to fertilize a woman's egg, but along WITH their ba11s comes a lack of caring what anyone thinks of them. Sorry, but it's true! Larry the Cable Guy is what I see when I draw a picture of "masculinity," so I DO NOT want to try to "pass" in a world of "Larries" and "Bubbas," lol.

    ReplyDelete
  59. Thank You Iris; you never,ever EVER fail to amuse! Looking forward to more of your ABSOLUTELY ridiculous juvenile comments.

    ReplyDelete
  60. @ Iris at 4:03 PM

    No, I'm not a "sweet simpering feminine airhead," but that doesn't make me a "man!" A man is merely someone put on earth to fertilize a woman's egg, but along WITH their ba11s comes a lack of caring what anyone thinks of them.

    That's true of some men, certainly, I'll give you that. They do tend to be less bothered by what others think of them. I don't see this as necessarily a bad trait. Personally, I don't much care what others think of the way I am and present myself, either. If they disapprove, I think, fuck 'em, that's their problem. Frankly, you should do the same, if you're proud of yourself and who you are. I think you said you are butch, didn't you? I see no shame in you being a butch woman, nor would I ever look down on you for that, but you have to remember that other people have the right to be what they want, too, without being shamed and attacked. Yes, even trans people have that right.

    I know there are many bad men in the world. But I also know there are many good ones. I'm not going to damn all men for the wickedness of some of them. Good men exist. My father, my brother. My uncles, my cousins. All decent men. Not a single 'Larry' or 'Bubba' among them.

    Larry the Cable Guy is what I see when I draw a picture of "masculinity," so I DO NOT want to try to "pass"

    If indeed anyone ever wished you to 'pass', or if you ever thought you needed to, why would you have to choose a poor role model instead of a good one? One thing an ftm individual has is the opportunity to create their own manhood in the most positive way, with full knowledge of what it means, and to show that you don't have to be a belching macho idiot to be a man. These stereotypes are outdated and need to go away.

    Were I to transition right now, I certainly would not be some ball-scratching caricature of a man. That would be stupid.I'd probably be like my brother, who is tall and sensible and a computer geek; except that he doesn't read fiction and I do, and he is smarter than me in some ways, though less imaginative. Apart from that, we are pretty much alike. We both take after our father in looks. We are often assumed to be brothers by those who don't know us. He has never been one to show off his chest, and he is not macho at all.

    ReplyDelete
  61. But see, that's just the thing -- height is something you CANNOT CONTROL, and with me being 5'3", I would instantly marginalize myself were I to redefine myself as "male." There's such a big difference between men's and women's heights that an average woman like me would be a shrimp of a "man," which is part of why I like to think it's impossible for me to be one. See, of whom more is given, MORE IS EXPECTED!!! I would much rather be the ugliest butch woman in the WORLD than to be read as an effeminate shrimp of a "guy," especially here in Texas and/or Louisiana where they're all about sports, hunting, and extremely macho interests I know NOTHING about!

    ReplyDelete
  62. @ Iris at 7:23 PM

    But see, that's just the thing -- height is something you CANNOT CONTROL, and with me being 5'3", I would instantly marginalize myself were I to redefine myself as "male." There's such a big difference between men's and women's heights that an average woman like me would be a shrimp of a "man," which is part of why I like to think it's impossible for me to be one

    Are you serious? You fear being male because you might have to be a short guy? The shortest guy I ever knew was barely four foot ten. He was still a man. Just shorter than the average. Didn't seem to stop him marrying and living a good life with a taller woman. height doesn't make the man.Is it harder to be a shorter guy? Certainly, because stereotypical expectations say a man should be tall. But not all men are tall. Many of the men I work with are no taller than me, and some are shorter.

    I know tall women, I know manly women, I know very femme women, i know very butch women. I know tall men and short men and gay men and straight men and femme men and macho men. I know men and women of all types. Don't you? Why do you buy into stereotypes? Why do you blind yourself?

    ReplyDelete
  63. I kinda get what Iris is saying..what is the point in being a short male?..The whole point is you can at least past with a version of male that appeals to you on some level. If your threshold is you can't imagine being male 5'3" then maybe it's a deal breaker and you can't see how that end in happiness. Theoretically why settle for a version of your ideal? When you look in the mirror you should be fucking ecstatic with what you see (at the very least)

    ReplyDelete
  64. Can someone please explain to me why I've seen ftms (I've known) end up being gay males? I never questioned their choices because it seemed rude, nevertheless I never could figure out a good reason why. I just do not get this dynamic. What went wrong?

    Lily

    ReplyDelete
  65. First, they do not end up "gay males", because they are female. They end up straight women. Second, because lesbianism is at the core of brain development, once their brains are bathed in "T", their homosexual core doesnt change, merely their attractions.

    dirt

    ReplyDelete
  66. Dirt, you're right of course but I am so use to using what they prefer and just too polite not to..bathed in "T" can make you hetero (frightening)?..I think the thing that blows my mind is they feel fine about it

    Lily

    ReplyDelete
  67. I have a theory as to why many FtM's go "androphilic," which is the best way to describe it without calling them gay or straight. You see, as a virgin lesbian female, I see men's bodies as DISGUSTING and am FURIOUS about society's expectation for me to like them. It also makes my blood boil that, while they are all a threat to me because they can get me pregnant, I am expected even by OTHER WOMEN to somehow overlook that very obvious fact and "love them" for it?!?!?!? And WANT MORE PAIN from additional childbirth after "not stopping at just one?!?!?!?" It's like, ARE YOU SERIOUS?!?!?!? But if I watched myself grow into a mannish being, I might lose some of that fear and hatred, thus seeing them as merely a bigger version of myself rather than mortal enemies. And with the loss of the tocophobia (fear of pregnancy) might come a willingness to engage in sex with them, due to an increased sex drive (which I do not have AT ALL as a woman).

    ReplyDelete

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