Change Your World-NOT your Body

Tuesday, December 20, 2011

Transition ends yet another relationship-Chaz Bono and Jennifer Elia's

Since Chaz and Jennifer's break up are already being discuss in the comments....

The once lesbian couple weathered many ups and downs during their more than a decade together, but transition, like a hurricane, completely leveled the foundation and any remaining structures of Chaz and Jennifer's relationship. Apparently Jennifer had some previous drinking issues that not surprisingly resurfaced when Chaz sprang her transition on Jen. Seems all the talk from Jennifer (like we hear all too often from a lesbian partner in the pre and/or initial stages of her female partner's transition) regarding how wonderful transition was for their relationship was just that, talk!

I definitely had many fears and trepidations regarding Chaz Bono publicizing and glorifying transition. Worried that her lauding to the media that transition is actually some viable solution for female self hatred in the absence of a fundamental feminism would only increase the already towering numbers of Trans Trending that is occurring among young women and girls today. But some assured me that Chaz as dual poster boy  and public spectacle for female transition might actually be have an opposing effect. And the more we hear from and about Chaz, her transition and its many fall outs, I think now that they were right.

Chaz truly has become the poster boy for female transition:

1) She was your basic tweener dyke, who still make up the majority of female transitioners.
2) Four years into transition and she still appears quite female.
3) Testosterone has not only redistributed her weight to her waist, it has also dangerously increased it.
4) She has odd facial hair growth.
5) Her long term lesbian relationship has ended due to her transition and obsession with it.

While Chaz is only one female who is in transition, everything that has happened to her, her body, her relationships can easily happen to any woman who falls prey to this gender straight jacketed nonsense!

Chaz Bono: A warning to the dangers of female transition if there ever was one!

And yes, I too suspect that if she hasnt already succumbed to a desire for dick, it is only a matter of time.

dirt
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58 comments:

  1. Just because Chaz and his fiancee' broke up doesn't mean it was due to his transition. They could have had problems that weren't publicized.

    If my fiancee' and I were to break up it sure wouldn't be because of my transition, that's for sure.

    As far as Chaz wanting dick, that is only your opinion. Chaz loves women as I do. I have been on T just as long as he has been and I sure as hell don't want no damn dick. I ave never been attracted to men and never will be either.

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  2. Chaz did very openly/pathetically blame the breakup on Jennifer's drinking problem.
    One thing for sure, Chaz will milk it for all it's worth in the media - God let's hope this doen't spark another book and/or documentary from Chaz's side.

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  3. Hawk, try following comment direction please.

    That said, Jen clearly stated Chaz's transition knocked her off the wagon. Given they had a long term lesbian relationship, we can suspect that Jen is a lesbian. Lesbians desire physically and mentally other women.

    If Chaz has physically and mentally changed aspects of herself that solidified her has a woman and a lesbian, its safe to assume her transition is why Jen dumped her.

    If your g/f is a lesbian, she will leave you at some point. Lesbians do not date men or women who think they're men. Why would we?

    Also Chaz does not "love women". In order to truly love a woman, she would have to love herself as a woman first and foremost. Female transition is based in pathological internalized misogyny.

    dirt

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  4. "Also Chaz does not "love women". In order to truly love a woman, she would have to love herself as a woman first and foremost."

    So men are incapable of loving women because they are not women? Is that what you are truly implying?

    This is proof that you are everything but a feminist. That is why I feel that feminism has become a dangerous mode of authoritarian empowerment for white women. I don't believe in it anymore because people like you have so seriously warped its definition that it has become a completely negative and oppressive element of social justice.

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  5. Here is a direct quote from Jennifer herself:

    'Well I can't blame it solely on Chaz's transition, my sobriety has always been a problem,' she told Morgan during the same May interview.

    'When he told me about this, I used it as a pass to fall off the wagon which is what alcoholics tend to do.'

    Hey Dirt, if you were not so intent on finding yourself and all other women and lesbians VICTIMS, you might be able to grow up some day.

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  6. So Jennifer did it - good for her. I always wondered how she was dealing with Chaz's obvious misoginy. I'm mean look how hateful she talked about women in front of tv cameras.

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  7. I don't believe that Chastity Bono is/ever was/will ever be transgender. Hands down.

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  8. "but none of us have suffered like Dirt or her supporters do in their obsession with denouncing us."

    Stop playing the victim card. You CAN'T deny the blatant misoginy which is there in the T community. There is no way to be that blind. As long as there is so much hate for females it would be just insane to stop fighting it.

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  9. because you really ARE women
    it comes down to whether you believe in reality or a medically augmented fantasy
    it's 100% accurate to say calling yourselves men certainly doesn't make it so!!!

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  10. and please tell us about this mens-only 'psyche' of yours!

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  11. AND these traits that you claim make youmen are entirely caused by drugs

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  12. no, i'm also a woman- i just don't follow your (& most of the world's) strict rules of gender (i think the trans belief in gender polarization is an extreme example of ultra-conservative thought, cleverly disguised as progressive)

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  13. "Calling us women won't actually make it so."

    But calling you females makes it so.


    " Nor does it affect how we see ourselves"

    Who cares. The blog isn't even aimed at you.


    " Our physical chemistry is not that of a woman's"

    What??!! Physical chemistry is about well physics it's about chemical kinetics, physical laws and so on. What has THIS to do with women?? Epic fail.


    "nor is our physiology"

    That's simply not true. You seem to be nothing but a troll or extremly uneducated.


    "or psyche"

    So....tell me what is the psyche of a woman and how can you be sure that you don't have it? Enlighten me great master of stupid science.


    Anyway it's really sad that Chaz a formerly lesbian transformed into a woman hating prick. It also baffles me that people are applauding to her misoginy.

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  14. Anon 4:03, you have it completely backwards as usual. Most oppressive thinkers usually have it backwards, so your behavior is not surprising.

    I don't give a damn about you. You are a fart in the wind, frankly. But what does bother me is that you feel that you can assert your hypocritical and oppressive opinions on the lives of people who you do not know from Adam. You don't know anything. You're blind.

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  15. Bee,

    you immature little prick. I am starting to be incredibly aggravated by your sense of entitlement to the legitimacy of ANYONE's character other than your own.

    Check yourself, sweetheart.

    Look how stupid you are and how aggressive you are in response to More's educated calmness:

    "So....tell me what is the psyche of a woman and how can you be sure that you don't have it? Enlighten me great master of stupid science."

    Reminds me of the movie The Crucible. Upon accusing a woman of being a witch, a man used the same logic. "If you don't know what a witch is, how can you be sure you are not one??!"

    Same witch hunt logic. You are an ingrate of EPIC proportions. You will never have control over my or anyone else's body or the way we see ourselves.

    Go get a job and speak on putting an end to RAPE, CHILD MOLESTATION, or SEX TRAFFICKING. Stop sitting your useless ass behind a computer screen and meddling in OUR lives.

    You disgust me.

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  16. "Stop sitting your useless ass behind a computer screen and meddling in OUR lives."

    Let's just see how FRAGILE the trans delusion is, if a few comments on a blog are enough to constitute meddling in someones life!

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  17. " You will never have control over my or anyone else's body or the way we see ourselves."

    Nope, the patriarchy already has that!

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  18. Dirt you should really moderate comments!! The trans trolls will not let people have a serious discussion.
    Trans allies aren't even able to write something about the original post. It's just arguing with crazies.

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  19. But Bee,

    The above did have a point. Your comment was full of spite and vitriol. You are just as much to blame. Please stop with the holier than thou attitude.

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  20. i don't think Bee was especially hateful
    the name-calling immaturity nearly always comes exclusively from the transists

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  21. My wife and I just watched "Becoming Chaz" 2 days ago. Watching their relationship deteriorating was painful. It seemed pretty clear to me that their relationship was definitely going to end. They both behaved like children, even their language was childish (i.e. saying "tits" and "fuck" every 5 minutes).
    I think grown-up's would have been in intense therapy due to both of their issues before, during, and after the transition (depression, alcoholism, obsession, fame whoring, etc.)However, they are obviously stunted in some ways as most spoiled brats are.
    It was just sad to watch. It was sad to watch Chastity become a T-Rage mentally unstable asshole and sad to watch her mentally unstable girlfriend act insane together.

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  22. @ More- I think it's fair to hypothesize that one partner transitioning from one "gender" to another would cause problems and possibly end a relationship. I'm NOT an alcoholic but if my wife told me she was going to be my husband in a year I would need a drink or 10 or 15.

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  23. Sure you can hypothesize that, but it's not what's been said about the breakup publicly. Additionally, thousands of couples break up every day for thousands of reasons and I think it's plain shitty to expect that trans people and their partners have issues only around transness. That's dehumanizing and dehumanization of transpeople is what really pisses me off. I fight with my wife because she buys things we don't need. It bugs her that I leave my boots by the bed and she trips over them. None of the issues we struggle with have anything to do with transness, so when are people going to acknowledge that we are human?

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  24. Agrees with Anon above. Have you even seen the movie MORE? It's pretty clear how Chaz goes from seeming pretty calm natured and loving towards her gf, to after transitioning, being a demanding, childish and misogynist douchebag. Also all the family and her own comments about the whole playing with boy toys and being all 'rough and tumble, like a boy' statements really to me just spoke AGAIN to people's strict gender rules, and how if you don't adhere to them you really must be a boy inside. which is bullshit and a step backwards. it's telling that the conservative, republician side of her family just loves chaz as a man. i would bet they were not so embracing when she was just a butch dyke.

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  25. I'm not a fan of Chaz Bono, either. I'm not exactly thrilled that his is the public face of ftm transness for most people. He appears to be a misogynist and he doesn't take care of his body very well given the risks of testosterone.

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  26. anon at 6:57-
    way to make it all about you. since when are we talking about you? were discussing chaz, who chooses to make her life very public, seeks it out actually. no one said anything about yall not being human. ahem play that victim card loud.

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  27. I too noticed when watching the documentary that not only did Chaz's relationship change with the gf after transition. But did anyone else notice how she treated the older lesbian couple who actually funded her surgery?! Suddenly she feels the need to tell the camera that now she is all separate from them, the only man in the room and finds their women's talk boring, etc. It was very odd to watch.
    That movie was a mess and really reinforced a lot. Another scene that was super disturbing was Chaz in the hot tub with the "transgender" child, bragging and trying to show a 5 year old her beard hair growing in. messed up.

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  28. You are talking about Chaz's relationship's demise as a function of his transness. I take that personally because I don't talk about lesbians breaking up because they are lesbians. Dumbass.

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  29. @ anon 6:57
    I think it's fair given their extremely public lifestyle (ie a documentary) for people to hypothesize that Chastity's decision to transition into Chaz had a negative affect on their relationship & possibly ended it. When one partner is clearly struggling with the decision (for all to see) it's impossible to think that the transition didn't have something to do with it.

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  30. 7:32 anon-

    way mature there. name calling.
    if you are indeed so happy and secure in your transness then go about your business. why the obsession with coming here with lame attempts of defending yourself?
    go enjoy your new found male privilege, yanno that wife of yours getting to be legal and all.
    notice, discussion without name calling = grown up and secure in oneself.

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  31. To Anonymous - your comments to Dirt (and I don't presume to defend her; she's very capable of doing that)re "I was told" and "sad alcoholic who spends most of her time in a sad bar.." really showed your pure ignorance. If you have gone way back into Dirt's older posts her intelligence and line of reasoning is w-a-y past yours.
    So many critics of hers are missing so many crucial points from a well-read and logical thinker that I think you do not have the attention span to follow the logic. Really.
    Really? - "I was told" - do you think this blog site is a tabloid where all the readers go "Oh, well, if she 'was told', then I guess it's true." COME ON!!
    Hey, Dirt, I found a quote by Sylvia Plath that I believe is so much of what you are saying to women: "I took a deep breath and listened to the old brag of my heart. I am, I am, I am."
    Every wannabee transitioner should ask themselves "what's so wrong with me just the way I am?"

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  32. "You tell me I am incapable of 'loving women' because of who I am. Just as a straight man tells you that you are incapable of "loving women" because you are a lesbian."

    A straight man says that? I've never heard a straight man say that, not even a homophobic one. Do you actually know any straight men? It's a serious question- I know Chaz says she doesn't have a single straight male friend in her life, so maybe that is common among FTMs. As someone with many straight male friends I can assure you that none of them say that. Very revealing that you should couch your homophobia and female-hatred in the words of a mythical "straight man" baddie. Didn't work. Your hatred of women and lesbians shines through to everyone reading.
    This is the internalized hatred of females that Dirt was talking about. You're blind to it in yourself but to the rest of us it's clear as day, and no bizarre "straight man says" bullshit can hide the fact. Try harder.

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  33. Can we talk about the atrocious "Throat Beard"? WTF is up with that? What man has a fucking "throat beard"? You can call it a "chin strap" all you like but that doesn't change the fact that testosterone gives women really weird hair growth patterns that are not only unattractive, but don't do anything to help you "pass".
    NO MAN has a freaking gross "Throat Beard".

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  34. I think Jennifer broke up with Chaz because of that throat beard.

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  35. "Do you actually know any straight men?"

    You're an idiot. Not even dignifying that horse crap with a response. Grow up.

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  36. Anon 8:30pm either you can't read properly or...you're just in your own little world. Nothing you said made any sense and none of that was ever implied. Stop imagining things alright, hun?

    Secondly and actually, that is a common belief amongst straight homophobic men. That lesbians are just confused women who know nothing about what a woman wants sexually to please her.

    But my point, nothing you said made any sense. So. Have a seat, kid.

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  37. Wait wait wait...we hate lesbians too now? Is that it??

    Haha. The things you people say on this trainwreck blog.

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  38. A throat beard would drive any woman to drink. And no, most FTMs do not have straight male friends.

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  39. I for one have plenty straight male friends. I always have.

    You people and your uneducated guesses. It's almost sad to see you fools scrapping about for things you desperately wish were true. I find it completely entertaining.

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  40. My fiancee' was with her husband for 16 years until she met and fell in love with me.

    My fiancee' isn't going anywhere and neither am I. We have been together for 3 1/2 years and are going strong. The only thing that could come between us is death. We are soul mates.

    I don't blame Chaz for not wanting to be with her seeing as how she has a drinking problem. You can't blame a drinking or drug problem on anybody but yourself.

    So what if they broke up anyways? If Chaz wasn't trans they still would have broke up. No big deal!

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  41. If Chaz Bono's transition was part of the reason his girlfriend broke up with him then it means nothing to us. Just because something happens to one Transguy doesn't mean it'll happen to any of us.

    Chaz Bono is a wreck and fame obsessed and I don't know many FTM's who like him. I think the way he talks about women is disgusting.

    Well some straight men do say "all she needs is the right man" about lesbians. Thats similar to saying that lesbians can't satisfy women or give women all the need.

    I don't think a Transguy's sexuality is anything to do with anything either. Who I am attracted to means nothing. I am attracted to men and women, men moreso than women and that doesn't make me any less a man.

    I have straight male friends but most of my friends fall somewhere in the LGBT.

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  42. Interestingly, I recently saw a program about Chaz's transition on OWN. In it, Jen made some comments about Chaz's testosterone-induced emotional and mental changes being hard to deal with. As such, I have no doubt that Chaz's transition had a lot to do with the breakup.

    This sort of thing is not at all unusual. A dear friend of mine was in a lesbian relationship, but her partner chose to transition, and while she loved her partner and tried her best to deal with it, the transition, combined with the fact that my friend is a lesbian, took its toll on their relationship.

    I've also known heterosexual women whose husbands chose to transition. Same thing. While some relationships can withstand transition (mainly because the non-transitioning partner makes huge compromises, often at the expense of her own happiness), most do not.

    People who transition have an amazing ability to blind themselves to what they put their partner through. I'm not saying that to be mean, but because from what I've seen, it seems to be true.

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  43. Etch hun, if all this means nothing to you or any other female transitioner who has commented, then one must wonder why you are here commenting?

    It has been stated clearly enough that this is a space for women to discuss these issues, if you do not embrace your femaleness, then why not discuss these issues elsewhere at trans sites?

    dirt

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  44. Anon@12:11am,

    The trans disorder, like most social disorders requires pure blindness.

    dirt

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  45. "People who transition have an amazing ability to blind themselves to what they put their partner through. I'm not saying that to be mean, but because from what I've seen, it seems to be true."

    You wouldn't expect a woman who realizes she's gay to stay with her male partner, so why would you expect a trans person NOT to transition for the sake of a relationship? That kind of sacrifice will never work.

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  46. whenever i see a ftm with a full beard it almost makes her not-rightness stand out more

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  47. This blog is a trashy tabloid.

    Junk.

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  48. I was making a point about the article. I just said that Chaz's transition and break-up does not reflect on all Trans people.
    If transition was what broke up his relationship then well that's awful for them but doesn't mean it'll end mine.

    I comment because I like to debate about these topics also because it makes me question things which I think is good. Well on a Trans blog I would be getting only a Trans view.

    I'm male but I embrace female aspects of my personality but that's all I can offer you Dirt.

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  49. People who transition have an amazing ability to blind themselves to what they put their partner through. I'm not saying that to be mean, but because from what I've seen, it seems to be true.

    Excluding the small percentage of the population who are bi-sexual, it would sound insane to most straight people if they were told that they should enjoy fucking someone of the same sex. As it would be equally insane to tell a lesbian or gay man that they should fuck someone of the opposite sex.

    But that's exactly what the transgendered do say. And they say it because they really do not comprehend the EXISTENCE of biological sex. Remember, to a transgendered person, bio sex is just something you buy at the doctor's office and/or alter by ticking off a different box on a piece of paper. It literally isn't real to them.

    LOL Well wait... bio sex IS real to them, but only when it exists in the brain! Apparently bio sex doesn't exist within the organs of the body, which is why "a pregnant man can give birth".

    They're just nuts, but unfortunately far from harmless. They think it's perfectly normal for a bio man to expose his erect "vagina-onna-stick" to little girls at Mitchfest for god's sake! At the very least, they need to be treated like any other schizophrenic who constantly spews nonsensical word salad. But at worst, they actually violate the physical safety of small children -- which means some of them need to be locked up.

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  50. I see where some are stating it is Chas' fault his g/f returned to the bottle. WHEN do we start taking responsibility for our own actions? Nobody can make me drink.. Nobody can make me take drugs.. Nobody can make me live a dysfunctional life. As is true for all people, I am responsible for my behaviors and actions.

    At which point do we quit blaming everyone else for our shortcomings?

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  51. "You claim it's misogynistic when you don't meet the standard that some men set for women but you dismiss Trans people for not meeting your standard of "man" and "woman". Like seriously... do you not see how ridiculous that is?"

    The usual trans mix-up of sex and gender!

    You ARE what sex you are, it's not (except for intersex people, which you ain't) subject to:

    "Just because my sex was assigned differently at birth does not give you justification to mispronoun me. "

    Mis-pronoun? YOUR sex was probably assigned totally correctly at birth, you just wish it was otherwise.

    The standard that some men set for women is gender and artificial. The standard for 'man' that you don't fit is biological and factual, and you don't fit fit it. False analogy, from the usual trans trend of conflating and confusing sex and gender.

    "Why is bio sex so important?" Evolution. It kind of matters for reproductive purposes. It matters to lesbians and gay men as well. It just IS important, and factual, it's not (unlike gender) something that you can CHANGE or play about with by surgery or otherwise.

    " Your view of me is not more accurate than my view of myself" Except as regards SEX, your opinion of it doesn't alter the facts. Plus in many cases, others opinion or view of ourselves from a psychological point of view often IS more valid and more insightful than our own! ALthough of course the trans disorder, being based on the mystical internal voice that tells you you are REALLY male, has to believe in the primacy and accuracy of your own opinion of your own sex/gender, because that's the basis for the whole thing.

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  52. "My sex was assigned correctly at birth but my gender was not.

    Its biological, yes. But it is not factual. I identify as male, I see myself as male.

    Well I have a right to gender myself how I feel,.."

    And the rest of us have the SAME right to say -- gender is illusory, and my use of pronouns is based on SEX, not the illusory concept of gender.

    Seeing yourself as male when you are biologically female is therefore totally illusory UNLESS you also believe that being NEVER going to agree.

    " I have a right to do what I want with my own body. " No you don't, because you can't do it alone, and the issues as to what it is moral for others to do with other bodies, whether in terms of plastic or other surgery, medical intervention, piercing, tattooing, sex change surgery or hormones IS a matter for society as a whole.

    "Well I have a right to gender myself how I feel" You've got a right to believe in gender if you so wish, and the rest of us have the same 'right' to not believe in gender, and to use pronouns according to sex, if we so wish.

    Still doesn't explain the supposed link between gender and bodies though..............

    The pro-choice argument is another strawman also, because the arguments as to WHY women should have control over their own reproduction and why abortion should be legal (but REGULATED, few women I know advocate abortion on demand at ANY point) still have to be made, it ISN'T the simple 'I can do what I want with my own body AND you as a surgeon should agree to do it to me if I want.......' that the trans lobby would like it to be.

    Think of yourself as male if you like, identify as male as hard as you can, but other have the perfect right to disagree with you on that one, seeing identifying as male as being a meaningless identification with a category that should be meaningless (i.e. gender).

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  53. "No you don't, because you can't do it alone, and the issues as to what it is moral for others to do with other bodies, whether in terms of plastic or other surgery, medical intervention, piercing, tattooing, sex change surgery or hormones IS a matter for society as a whole."

    Bad Dyke, do I understand your argument correctly? Are you actually saying that society, as a whole, gets to decide what we do with our bodies? The same society that doesn't recognize my right to love and marry whom I want, that excludes me from being near her when she is sick, that tells me I must let her suffer intolerably rather than opt for a humane passing that we wouldn't deny a dog?

    I'm flabbergasted.

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  54. i don't think BD is saying that society can or should decide what individuals do, but that like it or not one's actions do not only affect oneself but every person he or she comes into contact with

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  55. I do agree..wonder when Chaz will be doing dudes, now that s/he is so fucking misogynist 'becoming' one. I hated that video, and I hated how Chaz put down her girlfriend and screamed at her in the kitchen, just like any other sexist fucking dude..those hormones raging, too much testosterone poisoning in the world leading to wars and violence, we CERTAINLY don't need more in female bodies.

    I don't believe in transition. It's all artificial, there's NOTHING natural about it. It's all artifice, dressing, hormones, surgeries, attitudes all learned. If it's so innate, you wouldn't need all that crap. I DO believe in overcoming and eliminating gender sex role stereotyping that limits us as human beings, as females, as Dykes, as womyn. I don't give a hoot about men, they'll have to fend for themselves.

    But I've seen SO MANY trans videos especially on Logo,most of them Female to Male, and what happens to the LESBIAN FEMALE partner when her partner transitions to male...one is ecstatic, shouting their joy from the rooftops as they go through each stage of transition, the other gets sadder and sadder, seeing the person they love moving away from their Lesbianism, their femaleness, their female bodies/minds/spirits, to something other, misogynist, bad smelling with those male hormones, mean and sexist and aggressive, like Chaz...very much like Chaz. They say in the video they'll hold onto the relationship, but most eventually leave, AFTER ALL THEY'RE DYKES, and as DYKES they're attracted to women, and now their partner has attempted to erase and push away their womonness, their vulnerability, their compassion to be stereotypical male. Even more so than many bio-males, cuz every FTM has something to prove...that they are no longer the dreaded female 'ok for you, but not me'.

    I have NEVER felt solidarity with ANY FTM, because I'm so womon identified as a Butch Dyke.....in fact I've felt way more solidarity with even some straight men in my trade than with ANY FTM. EVER. Nor has any FTM actually reached out to me in solidarity, because they are too damned afraid that by hanging around a very visible out loud and proud Butch Dyke who is completely female positive and centered, would 'out' them as a 'former female'.

    So no wonder so many break up with their FTM partners, it should be no surprise, unless they were truly bisexual to begin with.
    -MasterAmazon

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  56. Well I agree with you on that one. Except just because he's Trans doesn't mean he's into dudes, if he is there's nothing wroing with that but T doesn't make you gay.

    I have friends who are Butch Lesbians, I don't give a shit if I don't pass because I'm hanging out with them. If I pass it's great but if I don't fuck it. It used to bother me but it doesn't anymore.

    I'm transitioning and you can't not believe in transition. It happens. Some FTM's don't take T. I don't even know whether I will.

    I agree with you on the point about lesbians staying with their FTM partner. If they're attracted to women I don't know why they'd stay.

    I would never treat a woman like Chaz treated his girlfriend. That was just wrong and it made me dislike him and dislike that he was now the most visable FTM out there.
    I treat everyone with respect and I would never treat a woman as "lesser than". I hate how some men treat women, how women are used to sell products in the media. It just shows how feminism is still needed.
    I'd class myself as a feminist because I believe in equality for women, I'd fight for that as much as I'd fight for Trans and LGB rights.

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  57. I've seen a lot of women start out as lesbians, take testosterone, and turn into some semblence of 'gay men,' either pairing up with other ftm's or suddenly wanting penetrative sex with men with real penises.

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  58. I'm a lesbian partner of a transitioning ftm and number 2 on this list actually gives me some hope. I've stated since she came out as trans that I'm not up for this, it's not what I signed up for. I'm sticking it out for as long as I can because I love her.

    My partners shrink told her that most of the couples she's counselling for this issue ends up breaking up BECAUSE the partner is trans. THis is not a lie or propaganda, it's the truth, just deal with that and stop trying to pretend like it's all a fucking rose garden because it isn't. Being a partner isn't funny or easy and the lesbian women out there who says it is are either pretending or fucking blind.

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