STOP THE HATE
STOP THE MISOGYNY
LOVE YOURSELF
dirt
Saturday, January 16, 2010
Thursday, January 14, 2010
Featuring Trans Mutlilater: Doktor Marci Bowers
Marci Bowers regularly performs female genital mutilation surgeries on ftMISOGYNYST women. Marci (Mark) Bowers also happens to be a MISOGYNISTtfaux (Mtf). Here are some samples of what he's doing to the "trans" disordered women (who pay out the nose btw) to see him.
Looking at the Doktor's work here I cannot help but ask wtf did this poor woman pay a minimum of $4000 for?? Your average women could shave her pussy and achieve the same results!
This is yet another example of misogyny in action! This Doktor is charging "trans" disordered females exorbitant amounts of money for results (a male penis) he cannot provide. The ftMISOGYNIST who see Doktor Bowers go in with an idea in their poor disordered brains of the "man" they are going to be when they leave. But what happens to the already disordered self image when one looks in the mirror and still sees their pussy staring back at them? Even the pussy's w/plastic balls STILL look like pussy's w/plastic balls!
I have to wonder how much jealously also plays a part in Mtf Doktor Bowers practice towards is female patients.
At any rate, here is another doktor whose mutilative practices are harming women, both physically and mentally, permanently! Doktor Bowers email is at the bottom of his website let him and the complaints board know these "procedures" are UNFUCKINGEXCEPTABLE!
STOP THE HATE
STOP THE MISOGYNY
LOVE YOURSELF
dirt
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Looking at the Doktor's work here I cannot help but ask wtf did this poor woman pay a minimum of $4000 for?? Your average women could shave her pussy and achieve the same results!
This is yet another example of misogyny in action! This Doktor is charging "trans" disordered females exorbitant amounts of money for results (a male penis) he cannot provide. The ftMISOGYNIST who see Doktor Bowers go in with an idea in their poor disordered brains of the "man" they are going to be when they leave. But what happens to the already disordered self image when one looks in the mirror and still sees their pussy staring back at them? Even the pussy's w/plastic balls STILL look like pussy's w/plastic balls!
I have to wonder how much jealously also plays a part in Mtf Doktor Bowers practice towards is female patients.
At any rate, here is another doktor whose mutilative practices are harming women, both physically and mentally, permanently! Doktor Bowers email is at the bottom of his website let him and the complaints board know these "procedures" are UNFUCKINGEXCEPTABLE!
STOP THE HATE
STOP THE MISOGYNY
LOVE YOURSELF
dirt
Wednesday, January 13, 2010
A Butch Conundrum
I've been in 5th grade for about a month now, its early October, a Friday, the weekend. School is out and my granny and I are getting ready for a weekend up north, up north being a few hours north of where I live. My dad gets out of work at five, he's a skilled labor painter for the local painter's union. This is the first time he'll be taking his new girlfriend and her son to our cabin with us. He lives elsewhere but I see him regularly and we go up north most weekends until winter.
His girlfriend's son, Bobby, is two years older than me. I've only met him maybe four times then. He runs his mouth a lot and tried to bully me from the moment we met, the Fourth of July at my house a few months before. My brother talked me down from kicking his ass the first time we met, the second time we meet I kick his ass after he bullies my younger cousin repeatedly then jumps on my back while out at the lake. My dad lets me beat his ass while my granny and his mom had left for snacks and pop. Other than him seeming quite the asshole I know little about Bobby.
My dad, his girlfriend and Bobby pull into our dirt driveway with the tire paths on either side of the grass between. My dad and his girlfriend come in for a few minutes while my granny and I collect ourselves, I dont know where Bobby is. Bobby comes running in the house, saying something is wrong with the cat next door, we all run out to witness the small tiger cat dying in agony. Its mouth open its eyes pleading, and me standing there, powerless. I do nothing. I cant do anything to save it. It dies in seconds after us seeing it. I'm crushed, grief stricken, depressed, I cant stop crying. It becomes apparent Bobby killed it, turns out Bobby has a habit of murdering small animals. His mother neglected to warn us. We pile into the car and go up north like nothing happened. I cant pretend. Something DID happen. I cant get the dying cat out of my mind, not on the way up north, not while up north, not while back home, not even now. I see it now dying as clearly as I saw it dying then, I am still powerless. I still cannot save it.
Once up north, I'm dejected and depressed and cry periodically. I dont want to ride my motorcycle or shoot my BB gun or go fishing or swimming or even run to the party store for candy. My dad tries everything to snap me out of it, but I dont snap. Later the next day he says something to me that I dont exactly recall, but I remember feeling his shame, which created a shame in me. A shame for having emotions, feelings, empathy for this dying cat that I didnt even know. I felt like I let my dad down for having these feelings, lost his respect, that I should be stronger. Stronger meaning male/r. Its the Butch conundrum. When we're treated like the tom/boy we seem, it gets forgot the girl that we really are. We forget it ourselves, till something reminds us and we feel a shame in our remembering. Imagine, shame for caring, utterly caring.
I would have given my life for that little cat that day, probably would today even. Today I feel blessed for having had the Butch GIRL capacity to grieve for that little cat's suffering/death, rather than the boyness to except it and move on as if it didnt exist at all.
dirt
His girlfriend's son, Bobby, is two years older than me. I've only met him maybe four times then. He runs his mouth a lot and tried to bully me from the moment we met, the Fourth of July at my house a few months before. My brother talked me down from kicking his ass the first time we met, the second time we meet I kick his ass after he bullies my younger cousin repeatedly then jumps on my back while out at the lake. My dad lets me beat his ass while my granny and his mom had left for snacks and pop. Other than him seeming quite the asshole I know little about Bobby.
My dad, his girlfriend and Bobby pull into our dirt driveway with the tire paths on either side of the grass between. My dad and his girlfriend come in for a few minutes while my granny and I collect ourselves, I dont know where Bobby is. Bobby comes running in the house, saying something is wrong with the cat next door, we all run out to witness the small tiger cat dying in agony. Its mouth open its eyes pleading, and me standing there, powerless. I do nothing. I cant do anything to save it. It dies in seconds after us seeing it. I'm crushed, grief stricken, depressed, I cant stop crying. It becomes apparent Bobby killed it, turns out Bobby has a habit of murdering small animals. His mother neglected to warn us. We pile into the car and go up north like nothing happened. I cant pretend. Something DID happen. I cant get the dying cat out of my mind, not on the way up north, not while up north, not while back home, not even now. I see it now dying as clearly as I saw it dying then, I am still powerless. I still cannot save it.
Once up north, I'm dejected and depressed and cry periodically. I dont want to ride my motorcycle or shoot my BB gun or go fishing or swimming or even run to the party store for candy. My dad tries everything to snap me out of it, but I dont snap. Later the next day he says something to me that I dont exactly recall, but I remember feeling his shame, which created a shame in me. A shame for having emotions, feelings, empathy for this dying cat that I didnt even know. I felt like I let my dad down for having these feelings, lost his respect, that I should be stronger. Stronger meaning male/r. Its the Butch conundrum. When we're treated like the tom/boy we seem, it gets forgot the girl that we really are. We forget it ourselves, till something reminds us and we feel a shame in our remembering. Imagine, shame for caring, utterly caring.
I would have given my life for that little cat that day, probably would today even. Today I feel blessed for having had the Butch GIRL capacity to grieve for that little cat's suffering/death, rather than the boyness to except it and move on as if it didnt exist at all.
dirt
Tuesday, January 12, 2010
The Death of a Baby Butch
The pure IGNORANCE of this is INFUCKINGCREDIBLE! In all likelihood this little girl is nothing more than your basic baby Butch. But given the ignorant fucking clueless parents along with an equally ignorant fucking clueless "gender specialists" this little girl is never going get to know the Butch girl she is or the Butch woman she could become, instead she's being brainwashed into believing she's a boy rather than a Butch girl!
I never wore a dress after age two, I had every hot wheel known to boy growing up, my dad bought me my first mini bike when I was 4, my first BB gun age 5, all my friends were males, my sex was questioned since age 3 by strangers, I HATED having to use the girls bathroom in school from day one, all very typical Butch girl feelings/behavior. I shutter to think what this poor girl's life is going to be like, and the constant confusion between who she is, who she thinks she is and the who her parents/shrink are telling her she is.
This is the danger with mainstreaming the "trans" disorder, parents who see gender play/feelings that do not coincide with their hetero-patriarchal conditioned ideas (butch girls/queenie boys) are going to have their kids trannifying before they're out of fucking diapers! This will end the lives of Butch girls before they even begin! This is why the general public needs to be educated on this disorder. We who are in the trenches know it isnt Butch girls and queenie boys who mostly develop this disorder, but straight males, straight females and tweener dykes!
But until the public can be educated, until doctors begin a different course in REAL treatment, baby butches are going to become (like this girl here) the victim of a disorder placed upon her by a hetero patriarchal medical system! The Butch in her is going to murdered right out from underneath her before her very eyes!
Butch visibility, its literally become life or death for some. And Femmes? Or any dyke who dates Butches, dont think its merely our problem, it is YOUR problem too! You know too well how small the dating pool is within Femme/Butch spaces, now think about that in light of this! Without the future of Butch women, who exactly are the future Femmes going to be coupling with????? If you love Butch women, this is your fight too.
BUTCH VISIBILITY
ITS LIFE OR DEATH
TAKE A STAND
STOP THE HATE
STOP THE MISOGYNY
RAISE YOUR HAND
SHOW YOUR FACE
REPRESENT
dirt
Monday, January 11, 2010
Miep Gies dies aged 100
I weep as I post this. I find this both horribly saddening and horrifyingly distressing. It has often been said that the "future is now" but as we move closer to day when no living person will have to quote J. Semprun "any REAL memory of this", I fear the future will prove Santayana correct “Those who do not learn from history are doomed to repeat it”.
dirt
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Butch: One of the Guys
"I
Have a self to recover, a queen.
Is she dead, is she sleeping?"
One of the guys; I was thinking about this earlier at the gym where I walked in and fist butt two guys on my way to the free weights, mutually nod at three other guys while going back and forth to the drinking fountain, gym gossiped with two other guys while doing shrugs and had a conversation with one guy about politics while hitting shoulders. These guys and a few others I speak/goof with are all the big monkeys who've been going to this gym (a golds) for a minimum of 10 years and other than a few exceptions all are straight males. The relationship I have with these guys is surface at best, we have a mutual report, a mutual respect and a commitment to ourselves through working out. None of which ever stops me from my commitment to myself as a woman, my commitment to other women or my commitment to dismantling patriarchy through disrupting/destroying its many patriarchal systems that support misogyny.
That being said, for all intents and purposes at the gym, I have very much become "one of the guys". Like a lot of Butches, something I'm quite familiar with being. Butches being such a small minority and Butch invisibility being what it is, as children Butches generally gravitate towards male friends because we share play interests and a way of being that seems closer to male than female at the time. Thats not to say we didnt have female friends as children, I think most of us did, but those friendships I think would better be classified as similar to the surface relationships adult Butches have with adult males. As children most Butches spend more time with boys and forge closer bonds with boys. From wrestling with them, playing sports with them, throwing stones with them, causing mischief with them, hamming it up with them etc
What I was thinking about at the gym today is how much of a divide between our self and our self is created through our growing up being "one of the guys" as girls? No doubt the larger the gulf the more time it takes to re-couple Butch with female as adult Butch women. I dont think the re-coupling even begins until Butches begin having serious love relationships with other women. And depending on the woman, some can and do even further that divide through their own personal demons/issues. As much as Butch is a core identity, it is also a long growth process requiring a great deal of personal insight before one can feel good about it. Insights we will sabotage ourselves until we reach a level a maturity that can handle those insights, and even greater levels of maturity before we can glean pleasure in ourselves from what those insights tell us about ourselves as women.
Because we aren't given opportunities in our youth to feel good about being butch(hell we arent even made aware of it), Butches take pleasure and pride in being "one of the guys" in order to "feel" butch by not feeling female. But through this close male association we often (for decades) lose the thing itself that makes us Butch, woman. Woman is something that EVERY Butch must recover and recover in her own individual way at her own individual pace, but make no bones about it, she IS something that in the ways of being all Butches misplace or hide, usually through shame. How can a Butch feel pride in her "one of the guyness" with her femaleness constantly hanging around???
This is why each and every adult Butch must step up and show off the unique woman she is, be visible, because all us Butches owe it all those baby Butches out there right now looking for themselves in every face and finding only males. Give these Butch girls a chance be "one of the Butches" for a change instead of the "guys" we were!
Butch Women-Represent!
dirt
Have a self to recover, a queen.
Is she dead, is she sleeping?"
One of the guys; I was thinking about this earlier at the gym where I walked in and fist butt two guys on my way to the free weights, mutually nod at three other guys while going back and forth to the drinking fountain, gym gossiped with two other guys while doing shrugs and had a conversation with one guy about politics while hitting shoulders. These guys and a few others I speak/goof with are all the big monkeys who've been going to this gym (a golds) for a minimum of 10 years and other than a few exceptions all are straight males. The relationship I have with these guys is surface at best, we have a mutual report, a mutual respect and a commitment to ourselves through working out. None of which ever stops me from my commitment to myself as a woman, my commitment to other women or my commitment to dismantling patriarchy through disrupting/destroying its many patriarchal systems that support misogyny.
That being said, for all intents and purposes at the gym, I have very much become "one of the guys". Like a lot of Butches, something I'm quite familiar with being. Butches being such a small minority and Butch invisibility being what it is, as children Butches generally gravitate towards male friends because we share play interests and a way of being that seems closer to male than female at the time. Thats not to say we didnt have female friends as children, I think most of us did, but those friendships I think would better be classified as similar to the surface relationships adult Butches have with adult males. As children most Butches spend more time with boys and forge closer bonds with boys. From wrestling with them, playing sports with them, throwing stones with them, causing mischief with them, hamming it up with them etc
What I was thinking about at the gym today is how much of a divide between our self and our self is created through our growing up being "one of the guys" as girls? No doubt the larger the gulf the more time it takes to re-couple Butch with female as adult Butch women. I dont think the re-coupling even begins until Butches begin having serious love relationships with other women. And depending on the woman, some can and do even further that divide through their own personal demons/issues. As much as Butch is a core identity, it is also a long growth process requiring a great deal of personal insight before one can feel good about it. Insights we will sabotage ourselves until we reach a level a maturity that can handle those insights, and even greater levels of maturity before we can glean pleasure in ourselves from what those insights tell us about ourselves as women.
Because we aren't given opportunities in our youth to feel good about being butch(hell we arent even made aware of it), Butches take pleasure and pride in being "one of the guys" in order to "feel" butch by not feeling female. But through this close male association we often (for decades) lose the thing itself that makes us Butch, woman. Woman is something that EVERY Butch must recover and recover in her own individual way at her own individual pace, but make no bones about it, she IS something that in the ways of being all Butches misplace or hide, usually through shame. How can a Butch feel pride in her "one of the guyness" with her femaleness constantly hanging around???
This is why each and every adult Butch must step up and show off the unique woman she is, be visible, because all us Butches owe it all those baby Butches out there right now looking for themselves in every face and finding only males. Give these Butch girls a chance be "one of the Butches" for a change instead of the "guys" we were!
Butch Women-Represent!
dirt
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