Change Your World-NOT your Body

Wednesday, October 6, 2010

"I Think I Might be Trans"

 In this dire time of ours, where transition has become the latest fad, especially among young females both gay and straight, I dont think stressing how typical their insecurities, confusions and dysphoric feelings are can be said/stressed enough. I have had so many comments and emails from trans(men) or females on the verge of transitioning saying to me something in the way of me, as a Butch woman, not understanding them/their position because Butches don't have body/gender dysphoria, that Butches are comfortable in their bodies.


It isn't like the term "stone butch" was pulled from thin air! Stone Butch is/was a term Butches/butches use/d to mask their sexual/genital/breast shame by not having to discuss that shame with a partner. Instead the Butch/butch could say simply "I'm stone" and this would signify that they did not want to be made love to. It is a term that has been used so much in Butch/Femme spaces and for so many years that rather than signify the sexual dysfunction that it is, it is now a signifier for "Stone Butch identity"! When sexual/gender dysphoria reaches the point it has become an identity, that my friends is some seriously CORE shame.

So, moving on and without further adieu some core reasons why you think you might be trans, but actually are sexually/gender dysphoric: (which isn't trans btw)

    1. You might think you are trans because as a child you felt like you were a boy/should be a boy.
    2. You might think you are trans because growing up you interior and exterior worlds were more in line with typical male behaviour/play/friendships.
    3. You might think you are trans because most/all your child/teen hero's were male.
    4. You might think you are trans because girls and girl things made you uncomfortable/felt alien towards.
    5. You might think you are trans because you felt like you would die when you went through puberty.
    6. You might think you are trans because you feel shame/discomfort around your period/period products.
    7. You might think you are trans because you felt your body betrayed you during puberty. 
    8. You might think you are trans because after puberty (especially) your body didnt feel like it was you.
    9. You might think you are trans because you want to look more butch or masculine.
    10. You might think you are trans because you feel dysphoric when a lover tries to make love to you.
    11. You might think you are trans because you hate being a girl/woman.
    12. You might think you are trans because you feel limited as a female.
    13. You might think you are trans because you are a top.
    14. You might think you are trans because you hate your breast and feel alienated from/by them. 
    15. You might think you are trans because you cannot deal with yourself naked.
    If you have any of these issues, it in no way means are you trans. Not one issue here has anything to do with being trans. There are reasons for all of these issues and your feelings around these issues and again NONE of the reasons are because you are trans. All of these issues are unfortunately fairly common among: Butches, butch persuasioned females, andro dykes, tomboys-both gay and straight. They can and usually are worked through by all mentioned above given time, love and acceptance.

    I will delve further into how these issues develop and give suggestions on how to push through these issues to where you can love and feel comfortable in your own natural body.

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