Change Your World-NOT your Body

Monday, January 12, 2009

The plight of the oppressed male????? HUH??

Fair use capped from one of our favourite trans sites!

Many might read a post such as this and think WTF? But actually this is fairly typical of both male and female trans persons. There is an ignorant assumption (likely due to the trans rose coloured glasses aka BDD) that all will be perfect (magical?) once the "transition" is "complete"(currently no such completion is possible medically).

There arent any classes or courses in "how to act like a REAL man or how to act like a REAL woman" for the post trans person. Something that eases them into a life as a different "sex" as it were. There is the ignorant or perhaps apathetic assumption made by the ME that once the trans person "transitions" the trans person is "cured". Because after all logically if one REALLY is a man or REALLY is a woman and the ME merely has to "correct" the "wrong" outside, both Mtfs and ftMs would quickly adjuct to what they have lived all along, only with a "body" that "matches". Except thats NEVER the case, is it.

No. Instead we see post after post after post of disordered men and women whom after the high of "transitioning" has worn thin or off completely and the reality they thought was real fades into the distance only to be replaced by actually reality, we see unhappiness at best, depression (even suicidal) at worst. As we see so clearly illustrated here with this woman.

She thought through the blur of her disorder life as a man was going to be idyllic. She has suffered (like many an ftM) sexual abuse as a child, her self hatred as a result of the child abuse later turned her to prostitution (a high statistic of sexually abused females). Through controlling men with her body (prostitution) she likely reclaimed a certain amount of power she had lost as a child victim. Her "transitioning" is likely a further extention of searching for a greater power the power of ownership of the male body itself.

As a "man" she would have power, be powerful, she would be heard and listened to, but sadly instead she finds being a man isnt all that its cracked up to be. It comes with its own set of problems, problems that she as a woman could not understand and remains ignorant and afraid to confront.

Like all trans persons, she has simply traded the prison of one role in exchange for the prison of another and is too afraid to live as she wants in either.

Umm remind me again what any of this has to do with lesbianism??????

the new radical lesbian feminist front


  1. This person's post is disturbing on so many levels.

    If I'm to follow the logic, it's "poor men because they know not what they do"?!?!?

    This is a variation of "Stockholm Syndrome".... My friend Jeff, the gay shrink, has often told me that it's not unusual for sexual abuse victims to identify, at many levels, with their abusers. Even to the point of rationalizing away and recasting the abusive behavior; and coveting the "power and control" the abuser held over them. He calls it introjection.

    You know, "poor Daddy; Mommy didn't love him right", etc..

    Another question I have is: How is someone with unresolved rape, sexual trauma and addiction issues a good candidate for transitioning?

    This person needed to be held, loved, protected and healed from all that had happened - not sent under the knife and dosed up on hormones. She's been abused every step of the way in her life.

    My mood: sad and appalled.

  2. My question to you is why isnt your question being discussed in the "LGBTQURS"???


  3. My question to you is why isnt your question being discussed in the "LGBTQURS"???

    It's not being discussed because many (most?) of the people in that community cannot tell the difference between an action and a reaction.

    This woman's life seems to be one of non-stop reaction: substance abuse, prostitution, transitioning and lord knows what else.

    MissAndre said it better than I ever could at Mich Fest recently.

    "One problem is that a consequence is not the same entity as it's antecendent. An action and a reaction are two separate but related entities. Determining the exact nature of that relationship is where logic comes in.

    I can believe there are monsters under my bed -- that is a belief. Lot's of people can agree that there are monsters under my bed -- that is a social construct. Because I perceive this belief to be true, I hide in the closet -- hiding in the closet is a consequence. But because consequence and cause are not the same, AND not exclusively dependent, there can be other consequences. I could sleep under the bed and dare the invisible and non-existent belief to eat me with his invisible and non-existent teeth, for example.

    Then afterwards, I could run for president, because I am not wasting my time hiding in the closet.

    A second problem. While some beliefs can have a real consequence, that consequence does not confer authenticity, legitimacy, or realness onto the belief itself. Consequence and belief are still separate entities. Monsters do not become real or true merely because some people react to false teachings, and reacting as if the monster exists only serves to perpetuate the myth. The only way to destroy a false teaching or a mythical monster is to react as if it doesn't exist -- because it doesn't.

    XXX, and YYY perhaps, believe that fake is real, believe there is only one consequence to a social construct, and further believe that this singular consequence must be bargained with using only one method. They provide no evidence that there is only one consequence, and provide no evidence that bargaining in a particular way is the only solution."

  4. It is both antiquated and inaccurate to believe that all sexual abuse victims fall into one of two catagories, prude or prostitute. For this poor woman, however,it seems to be true. She is abusing herself as punishment for the sexual abuse. I cannot imagine that she gained any power through prostitution. I think that somebody has watched "Pretty Woman" too many times. Women do not fall into prostitution to gain some kind of strength and power!
    She expected to attain these things by becoming a "man". How sad it is that there are still women who believe that a penis has power. They only have what we, as strong independant women, allow them to take from us. She has obviously let men control and manipulate her her entire life, so why I ask would she want to become one of them? This post has nothing to so with lesbians or lesbianism. I am so freaked out by her words and the VERY graphic images that I know they will haunt my dreams.

  5. Actually I've never seen "pretty woman". The power to which I was speaking is the deceiving psychologically believed power many women experience when THEY cause a man to have an erection.


  6. And what to say about people who encourage this woman, and others like her, into bad choices and false solutions that serve to perpetuate her self-negation?

    The Stockholm Syndrome (SS) is a psychological involuntary state in which victims of kidnapping or abuse begin to feel sympathy, emotional bonding, and solidarity for those who are abusing them or keeping them captive in oppressive situations.

    ....When victims are under tremendous emotional and physical duress, they may begin to identify with their abusers or captors as a defensive mechanism. The victim develops a strategy of staying alive by keeping the captor happy and eventually sympathizes with the captor....

    Stockholm Syndrome is a common survival mechanism of:

    captured brides
    battered women
    physically and/or emotionally abused children
    incest victims
    cult members
    concentration camp prisoners
    prisoners of war
    those in controlling/intimidating relationships
    hijacked victims


    - Emotional bonding with the captor/abuser
    - Seeking approval from the captor/abuser
    - Depending on the captor/abuser for security and purpose of existence
    - Befriending and caring for the captor/abuser
    - Resenting police and authorities for their rescue attempts
    - Losing one's own identify in order to identify with the captor/abuser
    - Seeing things from the perspective of the captor/abuser
    - Valuing every small gesture of kindness, such as letting them live
    - Refusing freedom even when given the opportunity

    Psychological Processes

    There are five powerful motivations working together to contribute to the development of the Stockholm syndrome:

    - The motivation to survive physically & psych.
    - The motivation to avoid pain and fear
    - The motivation to find hope and meaning
    - The motivation to find significance and security
    - The motivation to seek acceptance and relationship

    Although these are primary motivations operating in all sorts of situations, most of the time only one or two motivations may predominate....

    However, in a hostage or abuse situation, all these motivations are operating and contributing to the bonding between the victim and the abuser. Such a relationship is strengthened both by the negative reinforcement of relief from pain and fear, and the positive reinforcement of approval and recognition.


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