Change Your World-NOT your Body

Tuesday, July 1, 2008

"Naked Spots"!

Dirt KNOWS dresses dammit! If I havent mentioned it and I dont think I have Denise (after 12 fucking years) is FINALLY marrying her long term b/f Damon. They arent doing anything fancy, just one of those Vegas trip deals. So Denise is looking for a dress, again nothing fancy, just kinda simple and classic. She sends me these pics of a dress she likes this morning...


So she's telling me she really likes this dress but she doesnt like that its strapless. You know me and my good heart as well as always thinking on my feet, I tell her to go ahead and get it cuz I have a pair of black shoelaces still in the wrapper and I'll gladly stich them on the dress as straps, by HAND mind you! You think the cunt would be fucking thankful, but NOOOOOOOOOO! Ungrateful bitch!

Then dieks calls me and I told her Denise wants her to look at this dress and tell her what she thinks.(cuz apparently I wasnt good enough) Dieks is working at the new house trying to get their shit unloaded so until she gets back to the hotel tonight she doesnt have internet access. She asks me "well whats the dress look like"??

me: its black
dieks: and?
me: umm long
dieks: thats it?
me: its strapless too, which she doesnt like
dieks: thats it? whats the material look like?
me: uh, ummm it has naked spots
dieks: WHAT?
me: naked spots, where you can see through it.
dieks: like sheer?
me: I dont fucking know, NAKED SPOTS!
dieks: fucking call denise 3-way!

Now tell me I didnt give a pretty good description based on those pics!

dirt
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